All that Matters...

Log? What log?

2011-04-01T09:02:00.000-07:00

"And why worry about a speck in your friend's eye when you have a log in your own? Matthew 7:4

This verse came up in small group this morning, and we were talking about it, and about how much easier it is to worry about what is wrong with those around us, than to have to open ourselves up to God and ask him if anything in OUR OWN nature offends him or causes him distress.
This morning, as I was driving to work, God illustrated this verse to me very uniquely.
I was driving in the fog (unusual for this time of year, but present nonetheless). As I came to a street that bled into the main street I was on, a car swerved onto the road and cut me off! I was pissed! (excuse my language but my level of anger was pretty high).
For a full 20-30 seconds, I berated this person in my head for their lack of driving skills and the stupidity of their decision to pull out in front of someone in the fog. How dare they?
Then, a tiny voice whispered in my ear,
“Um…did you forget to turn your headlights back on?”
Anger turned to chagrin, as I realized that in my haste to run back into the house this morning and grab something, I had failed to turn my headlights back on once I got in the car. No wonder this other car had cut me off! In the fog, I must have been nearly invisible! I was to blame all along, and I had been too busy berating this other driver to notice.
With all these thoughts swirling in my head, this verse came to mind. “Why are you worrying about his speck when your log is much bigger?” It was right…
Of course, this lead to all sorts of thoughts about other times I had focused on the wrongs of others and ignored my own part in the situation or my own faults. In that moment…that tiny moment…I understood this verse as I had not before.

**Lord, please forgive me for the times I have been self-righteous or ignorant of my own faults while focusing on the faults of others. Help me to “check my heart” constantly and se what lies inside. Help me also to see others with the love and grace of Christ. Thank you father for chastising me gently, and teaching me greatly. Amen.

God in the Fog

2011-04-01T08:34:00.000-07:00

Commit your way to the LORD;

trust in him, and he will act.

He will bring forth your righteousness as the light,

and your justice as the noonday.

—Psalm 37:3-6

I just love how God speaks to me in the most random ways. this morning, God spoke to me about two separate things in a manner of minutes (the second of which I will go into in a separate post). Anyway, it all started as I was getting ready for work…

Anyway who knows me well, knows that I give myself 1.5-2 hours toget ready in the morning. Not, as you may think, because I am the type to spend hours on my hair and makeup or picking out the perfect outfit, but quite honestly, because I am easily distracted  So, this morning being no exception, I was sitting on the couch looking at facebook on my phone when I should have been getting in the shower, and I came across a blogpost from youtube regarding “Desert Song” from Hillsong. Jill was talking about the loss of her child and how she learned through that experience that you can’t stop praising God just because you don’t feel like it. She said as you continue to praise in the midst of the pain, you thwart what Satan is attempting to do through you in the pain and because of the pain.

As I listened to her speak, I teared up. I couldn’t identify with her loss, but her story spoke to me so strongly (in fact, two minutes later, I bought and downloaded “desert song” on my phone). Through my whole morning, it stayed with me. I couldn’t shake her words from my head no matter how hard I tried.

As I left the house and got in my car, I realized it had become very foggy (on April 1st…really??). I began to muse about the fog and the reason for the fog and what purpose fog serves other than to annoy us who live in it. As my thoughts turned negative, a brilliant pink and red sun rose out amongst the fog. It was so incredibly and beautiful and full of color, that I took out my phone camera and snapped a picture of it (which did it no justice, but I had left my ACTUAL camera at work…darn!).

As soon as I looked at the picture, I heard God tell me this:

Life is like that sometimes you know. We get stuck in the “fog’ times of life, and we wonder if there is a purpose for it; if there is a plan for it. In those times, we often get so concentrated on the fog, that it affects our perception of what is actually going on. However, if you look at the full picture here, you will see something. Without that fog, the glory of the sun would not have been able to be seen. The light of the sun would have been too bright for you to look at it directly and you would have missed this incredible thing I have for you. Your life, is much the same way. The “fog” times in your life come so that the beauty of the SON can be seen. Don’t resist those times…allow them to happen, because as you walk through the fog, you never know when the SON will choose to show himself, and in that moment when he does, it will be beautiful.

**Thank you Lord. Thank you for showing me that even when life seems dull or meaningless or monotonous, you are always working behind the scenes planning and creating something I can’t even begin to imagine. Thank you for your faithfulness and your guiding hand. Amen.

Making a house a home

2010-10-01T16:30:00.001-07:00

So I just moved, and I am slowly but surely making this house a home. Here's a little preview of things to come!

New house...new relaxing spots!

2010-10-01T16:25:00.000-07:00

Sorry..I've been gone a long time! But IM BACK (Or at least Im trying to be). Well things have been interesting lately. I moved into a bigger place recently, and my cat, DRIA (short for Alexandria), has found some interesting places to claim as her own. Thought I would share a few pictures.

Finding solace in the simplistic

2009-05-28T15:12:00.000-07:00

"So here;s what I want you to do, God helping you: take your everyday life-your sleeping, eating, going to work, and walking around life-and plac it before God as an offering. Embracing what God does for you is the best thing you can do for him. Don't be so well-adjusted to your culture that you fit into it without even thinking. Instead, fix your attention on God. You'll be changed from the inside out." Romans 12:1-2 (CEV)

I discovered this incredible set of verses the other day, and it was love at first sight (not to mention that I am LOVING my contemporary Bible...it's helping the Bible become new and fresh for me). What an amazing, yet amazingly simplistic idea!Sometimes I think we make Christianity more complicated than it is. I also think sometimes we make it into a "chore" We get into the thought of "I HAVE to get up and go to church...I HAVE to read my Bible...I HAVE to pray before bed," etc... Here, Paul is saying, "Look! Here's what you do...take each day and give it over to Christ!" Don't worry about the haves and have nots and what and what ifs, and simply embrace each part of your day and what God is doing through each part of your day. Offer each moment up to him and abide in him.

I've been working on that lately...REALLY working on it, and as I have, this indescribable peace has begun to wash over me. I've got so many things going on in my life right now that should...according to society...be worrying me, and stresssing me out, and driving me insane...but I'm okay. I know that in his time, God will show me how to walk each and every one of the roads stretched out before me and as it says in Habakuk, "If it seems slow in coming, wait patiently,
for it will surely take place. It will not be delayed." Now I'll be the first to admit, I'm not perfect at it..in fact just today I responded quickly and yelled at a student in my classroom instead of taking the time to answer in a more appropriate manner. But as I abide in him through my days, I'm finding longer and longer stretches of peace and patience. I'm finding that even when they are at their worst, I can usually talk to my students in a calm yet rational manner. If you would have seen me last year or even the beginning of this year, you would see that this is me embracing what God is doing IN me, b/c it's definitely not on MY OWN strength.

So...search his WORD, and find ways to offer your day to him. include the Lord in every part of your day...from waking till sleeping. Don't conform to the ways of the world, but constantly be renewed and transformed in your mind by the "renewing of our minds" so we align ourselves with God's plan and purpose and follow in his path.

He Holds our Hand in His

2009-05-14T15:07:00.000-07:00

Lately, I've been working on daily walking with God. I try and start each day with him and end each day with him. I seek to find myself hyper-aware of his presence consistently throughout the day.

Yesterday morning, the enemy began attacking my mind. Instead of giving into it, I said (out loud...in the car) "You will not touch me for I'm not alone in this car...the Lord is here with me and he is stronger than anything you can throw my way"

Then, a thought flashed in my mind. You see...many times my Pastor has talked about doing something physical as a representation of something you have done in the spiritual (like stamping your foot on the ground to stamp the devil down and keep him at bay or something like that). Sooo...I reached out my RIGHT hand, and mimicked gripping the hand of my passenger (my Lord and Savior). At first, I'll admit...I felt a little foolish. But as I imagined God sitting in the sit next to me, his hand in mine, his face radiant and full of peace, my tensions began to fade and by the time I got to work I was extremely calm and actually had a GREAT day.

This morning, I opened my Bible to read, and was greeted by these words from the book of Isaiah,

"For I hold you by your right hand-I, the Lord your God. And I say to you, "Don't be afraid. I am here to help you." Isaiah 41:13

What a blessing this verse is! God was indeed there with me as he continues to be everywhere I go...this morning, I feel like he wanted to remind me :O) Thank you Jesus for the reminder.

It was funny, b/c in a coincidence of sorts (for I don't truly believe in coincidences), one of my students was walking back to his desk today after having turned in his Math test, and he turns back and says, "Guess what Miss Crone?"

"What?" I ask him, expecting something funny like, "chicken butt" or something (he IS my class clown afterall), and he looks back at me and says,

"God is with me wherever I go and he protects me."

Soooo sweet....and so goes along with my lesson for the week. God is with us wherever we go and he will uphold us. Thank you Lord for that knowledge.

My new favorite Bible Verse!

2009-05-12T12:28:00.000-07:00

For though we live in the world, we do not wage war as the world does. The weapons we fight with are not the weapons of the world. On the contrary, they have divine power to demolish strongholds. We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ.

2 Corinthians 10:3-5

Boys have babies??

2009-05-05T15:40:00.000-07:00

One of my students, Alyssa, and her twin brother Joaquin, were in my classroom afterschool. We were talking about their mom, who is noticeably pregnant.

"So what do you think..." I asked them, "Baby brother or baby sister?"

"I think it's a boy" Alyssa said excitedly, "What do you think Joaquin?"

He leaned towards us, laughed, and said,

"It HAS to be a boy.

"Why does it HAVE to be a boy?" I said, openly curious.

"Because" he said, grabbing my cheeks in his hands, "Girls don't have girls...they only have boys."

I laughed as he pulled away, totally proud of himself.

"But who has girls?" I asked him

He whipped around, laughed, and shouted out,

"Boys....duh!"
HAHAHAHAHA! So the next time you see a pregnant boy....wish him well on his new daughter! TOO CUTE NOT TO PASS ON!!

XOXO~

Jenn

Captivating Pt. 3

2009-05-01T16:17:00.000-07:00

Men need to take their own questions to God. Only he knows who they truly are. A man goes to Eve to offer his strength. He does not go to her to get it (p 151)
Eve was made for Adam. There is an incompleteness that haunts us, makes us yearn for one another (p 152)

No man can tell you who you are as a woman. No man is the verdict on your soul . Only God can tell you who you are. Romance with HIM must come first. Adam is far too unreliable a source(p 152)

Until our healing comes from God, our relationships are really hurt by this looking-to-each-other for something only God can give (p153)

We cannot love Adam while we are looking to him to validate us. It will usher in too much fear. If he’s the verdict on us as a woman, we won’t be able to truly and freely offer him our beauty (p 153)

What a man needs to hear from his woman is I need you. I need your strength. I believe in you. You have what it takes (p161)

Friendship is a great gift. One to be prayed for and not taken for granted. Friendships need to be nurtured and guarded and fought for. We need to call one another without waiting to be called first. We need to ask how are friends are doing and really listen to their answers. We need to listen between the lines. We love our friends by pursuing them: calls, little presents, cards, invites, etc… We offer our hearts (p181) Let me say clearly that true friendship is OPPOSED! We need eachother. We have only to ask and surrender, to wait, to hope, and in faith to love.

Redeemed women of God have tender, merciful hearts, backbones of steel, and hands that have been trained for battle. There is something incredibly fierce in the heart of a woman that is to be contended with-not dismissed, not disdained, but recognized, honored, welcomed, and trained. (p 188)

A common enemy at work in women’s life’s is the spirit of accusation. We often feel that we are a disappointment to others, that they disapprove of us. We feel in their presence that we are not enough, or that we are too much (p 193)

Often the hardest person to fight for is…yourself. But you must. Your heart is needed. You must be present and engaged in order to love well and fight on behalf of others (p195)

We need to grow in our understanding and practice of spiritual warfare not only b/c we are being attacked but b/c it is one of the primary ways we grow in Christ. He uses the spiritual warfare in our lives to strengthen our faith, to draw us closer to him, to train us for the roles we are meant to play, to encourage us to play those roles, and to prepare us for a future at his side. (p195)

God allows spiritual warfare and uses it in our lives for our good. It is how we learn to grow in exercising our God-given spiritual authority as women (p196)

Much of what he allows in your life is not for you to simply accept but to get you to rise up! God wants you to know how to wield the weapons of warfare (Ephesians) how to take a stand, and how to fight (p196)

Security is not found in the absence of danger, but in the presence of Jesus (p206)

No one can be to the people in your life who you are to them. No one can offer what you offer. There are many things that God calls us to do, but loving well always comes first. And don’t your relationships feel opposed? Of course. They must be fought for. (p210)

All the enemy has to do to destroy people’s lifes is to get them isolated. He makes a woman feel like, “What do I have to offer really? They’re probably doing fine.” Don’t you believe that for a moment. You have been sent by the Trinity on behalf of love, of relationships. Fight for them. (p210)

The place that God calls us is that place where the world’s deep hunger and our deep desire meet. (p213)

We don’t get to wait to offer our lives until we have our acts together. We don’t get that luxury. If we did, would anyone ever feel like offering anything? God asks us to be vulnerable. He invites us to share and give in our weakness. He wants us to offer the beauty that he has given us even if we are keenly aware that it is not all that we wish we were. He wants us to trust him. (p215)

Spiritual battles

2009-05-01T12:24:00.000-07:00

For we are not fighting against flesh-and-blood enemies, but against evil rulers and authorities of the unseen world, against mighty powers in this dark world, and against evil spirits in the heavenly places.
Ephesians 6:12

Last night, I got together with one of my best friends for the 1st time in awhile. We were sitting in her kitchen, and she said, “I need to tell you something. I’ve been going through something lately. I want to explain it to you b/c I’ve been so afraid that you would think it was you…the fact that I haven’t called lately.” As she began to talk, she told me a little about her walk with God lately and how she is finally reaching a point where she mentally completely trusts God and is fine with wherever he is going to lead her in the next phase of her life,

“But I don’t know” she continued, “It seems like I am battling against myself. I have been exhausted and disconnected from everyone, and I don’t know how to explain it…I feel like I am above myself watching myself walk around, but not in my body…does that make sense?”

The more she talked….the more my mouth began to drop, until finally I blurted,
“Did you read the email I sent you earlier today?”

“No” she answered…”You of all people know how busy I was today. I haven’t checked my email.”

“Open it” I told her…practically speechless. She opened her email, opened my email, and we were greeted with my words (which I have copied for you here out of my “sent” box):

I don't know how to explain it...I've been feeling really restless and disjointed lately. I feel like I am watching life happen from outside my body...I am on autopilot much of the time lately. I feel disconnected from EVERYONE in my life.

The strangest part of our conversation came in the fact that I too, have been total content lately with letting God take control of my life and I’ve been working to bring EVERYTHING in my life under his command. I’ve been waiting on him and studying him and worshipping him in ways I haven’t in a LONG time (if EVER), but I feel like I’ve been fighting through this thick layer of opposition…most of it emotional . I think I’ve never before this moment, realized what it’s like to battle a spiritual battle, but when I got an email from a THIRD friend saying something similar to what we had both just said, it all began to “click” for me.

For we are not battling persons of flesh, but we are battling spiritual persons and spiritual demons. A war is being waged for our souls and the souls of those we touch (including each other), and SOMEONE, is NOT HAPPY with the way things are turning in our lives lately. SO…I say to those spirits today, that pushing past the emotion to the truth of who God is and who he continues to be from day to day, we will persevere and all their attempts to thwart the plans of God will not succeed. In case they haven’t read the Bible yet, let me give them the Cliffs notes version: HE WINS! So praise God for that revelation today and know that no matter what your fight is today (for we are all in a fight of some sort), Greater is he that is in you than he that is in the world! Have Faith in that and know he will see you through whatever the deceiver sends your way!

Stay alert! Watch out for your great enemy, the devil. He prowls around like a roaring lion, looking for someone to devour. 1 Peter 5:8

He has always hated the truth, because there is no truth in him. When he lies, it is consistent with his character; for he is a liar and the father of lies. John 8:44
Why are you downcast, O my soul? Why so disturbed within me? Put your hope in God, for I will yet praise him Psalm 42:5

For wisdom will enter your heart, and knowledge will be pleasant to your soul Proverbs 2:10

When my spirit grows faint within me, it is you who know my way. In the path where I walk men have hidden a snare for me. Psalm 142:3

Therefore, put on every piece of God’s armor so you will be able to resist the enemy in the time of evil. Then after the battle you will still be standing firm. Stand your ground, putting on the belt of truth and the body armor of God’s righteousness. For shoes, put on the peace that comes from the Good News so that you will be fully prepared.In addition to all of these, hold up the shield of faith to stop the fiery arrows of the devil. Put on salvation as your helmet, and take the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God. Pray in the Spirit at all times and on every occasion. Stay alert and be persistent in your prayers for all believers everywhere.
Ephesians 6:13-18

God is speaking...

2009-04-28T07:07:00.000-07:00

This verse keeps coming to me over and over lately:

"'For I know the plans I have for you,' declares the LORD, 'plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.'" Jeremiah 29:11 NIV

Captivating-Pt 2

2009-04-27T16:12:00.000-07:00

Most women fear that when people see who they are, they will be alone…no one will ever truly come for them (pg 88)Not only do women fear they will be abandoned by the men in their lives, they fear it from other women as well-that they will be abandoned by their friends.

Remember this-as a bridegroom rejoices over his bride, so will your God rejoice over you. You are passionately loved by the God of the universe. You are passionately hated by his enemy. It is time for restoration-There is one greater than your enemy. One who has sought you out from the beginning of time. He has come to heal your broken heart and restore your feminine soul. (pg 91)

In love, God blocks your self-redemptive plans. Otherwise, we would never fully turn to him for our rescue. (pg 97)

The trouble with steeling yourself against the harshness of reality is that the same steel that secures your life against being destroyed secures your life also against being opened up and transformed (pg 98)

We all pretty much handle our brokenness in the same way-we mishandle it. It hurts too much to go there, so we shut the door to that room in our hearts and we throw away the key(pg 99)

The best thing we can do is let Jesus come in, open the door and invite him in to find us in those hurting places (pg100) In order to experience his healing, we have to give him permission to come into the places we have so long shut to anyone.
Your wounds brought messages with them: You’re worthless, you’re not a woman, you’re too much…or not enough, you’re a disappointment, you are repulsive. On and on they go. Because they were delivered with such pain, they felt true. They pierced our hearts and they seemed so true. So we accept the message as fact. We embraced it as the verdict on us (pg 101)

So much energy is devoted to “keeping it together”. Like Rindy Ross sang, “I’m gonna harden my heart. I’m gonna swallow my tears”. Part of this is driven by fear that the pain will overwhelm us. That we will be consumed by our sorrow (pg 101)

Let the tears come. Get alone….and let the tears come. It is the only kind thing to do for your brokenness. Allow yourself to feel again…grief is a form of validation; it says the wound mattered. It mattered. That’s not the way life was supposed to go. There are unwept tears down in there-the tears of a little girl who is lost and frightened or a teenage girl who has been rejected, or a woman whose life has been hard and nothing close to her dreams. Let the tears come (pg 102)

Our wounds, our vows to harden our hearts, the agreements we’ve made with the messages, all give ground to the Enemy in our lives (pg105) Ask God to destroy your enemies.

We’ve all tried so hard to find the fulfillment of this love in other people, and it never, ever works. Give this treasure back to the one who can love us best. (pg 107)
God delights in revealing himself to those who will seek him with all their hearts (pg 117)

Choose not to shut down. Let the tears come. Allow the ache to swell into a prayer of longing for God. And he does come…those times then bring healing to places in our hearts that still need his touch (pg 119)

We long for the protection masculine strength can offer. To have them shield us from physical harm, yes. But also to have them shield us from emotional harm and spiritual attack (pg 129)

The strength of a man is 1st a soulish strength-a strength of the heart. As he lives it out, owns it, inhabits his strength, he becomes more handsome-more attractive. (pg 130) The beauty of a woman is first a soulful beauty. As we live it out, own it, inhabit it, we become more lovely. More alluring. Our true self becomes reflected in our appearance. But it flows from the inside out.

Beauty is the most essential and most understood of all the feminine qualities. Beauty is an essence every woman carries from her creation. The only thing that stands in the way of our beauty is our doubts and fears, and the hiding and striving we fall to as a result.

The scariest thing for a woman is to offer our beauty into situations where we don’t know if it will make any difference…or worse, that we will be rejected (pg 141)

God loves it when we, gripped with doubt and fear that he will not be enough, choose to turn the gaze of our souls to him in hope. He loves to prove himself faithful and more than enough to satisfy our hungry souls. (141)

To possess true beauty we must be willing to suffer….by saying “yes” when the world says “no”. By paying the high price of loving truly and honestly without demanding that you be loved in return. (pg 143)

When we choose not to hide, when we choose to offer our hearts, we are choosing to love (pg 147)

Captivating Part 1

2009-04-24T15:36:00.000-07:00

Okay, so I have just begun reading Captivating by John and Stasi Eldredge. It’s a very interesting book about women and the power of God to change them. The beginning half of the book (what I’ve read so far), talks about things that lie deep within the heart of women. Basically, it lays out things women think or feel but would never admit to. It was very interesting to read this part of the book for a couple of reasons:

#1: Parts of this book felt so intimate, like they were pages ripped out of the diary of my own life. I almost felt myself, as I got more and more into the book, wanting to read it in secret…in hiding…thinking surely someone could see by the expression on my face that I too was like many of the women in this book. I felt very much like the little boy in the Neverending Story, when he hides himself in the attic with his book.

#2: It was very comforting to see that things I have felt or experienced in the past are part of an ancient unfolding story that encompasses women in general. One of the things that this book kept saying is that no matter how full their lives are, women often feel “alone” much of the time, and I was like “Wow..you mean that was normal?” It also goes through several other things commonly experienced by women that made me go, “So it’s not just me? Wow.” Anyway, I though I would take the next little while to include quotes from the book as I read along. I won’t write out everything that I’ve highlighted (b/c trust me, there has been A LOT), but a few things I think might help guys understand the women in their lives better and women to see that we are indeed VERY normal (but broken, and only God can come into those broken parts and restore us):

*All girls to some degree, long to be, “seen and desired, to be sought after and fought for” (pg. 9)

*Most of our addictions as women flare up when we feel that we are not loved or sought after. At some core place, maybe deep within, perhaps hidden in her heart, every woman wants to be seen, wanted, and pursued (Pg10)

*There is something fierce in the heart of a woman. Simply insult her children, her man, or her best friend and you’ll get a taste of it (pg 11)

*In spite of all the pain and distress that beauty has caused us as women, the desire to been seen as beautiful remains. We desire to possess a beauty that is forth fighting for, a beauty that is core to who we truly are (Pg 16-17)

*We clearly haven’t learned the lessons of Eve’s story, because if we had, men would treat women much, much differently, and women would view themselves in a far better light (pg22)

*Every woman has a beauty to unveil…EVERY woman. Because she bears the image of God. She doesn’t have to conjure it, go get it from a salon, have plastic surgery or breast implants. No, beauty is an essence that is given to every woman at her creation (pg42)

*Most women doubt very much that they have any genuine beauty to unveil (pg45)

*We are more keenly aware of our shortcomings than anyone else (pg 46)

*Nearly all a woman does in her adult life is fueled by her desire to be delighted in, her longing to be beautiful, and be irreplaceable (pg46)

*We tend to be grasping, reaching, controlling. We are enchanted, like Eve, falling so easily prey to our enemy’s lies. Having forfeited our confidence in God, we believe that in order to have the life we want, we must take matters into our own hands. And we ache with an emptiness nothing seems able to fill (pg49)

*Most women hate their vulnerability. Most of our energy is spent trying to hide our true selves, and control our world to have a sense of security (pg50)Fallen Eve controls her relationships. She REFUSES to be vulnerable. She becomes a woman who “doesn’t need anyone-especially a man”. Women dominate and control because they fear their vulnerability (pg52)

*We have never considered that by living a controlling and domineering life, we are refusing to trust our God. And it has also never dawned on us that something precious in us is lost. Something the world needs very much from us. (pg53)

*Women hide. We hide our truest selves and offer only what we believe is wanted, what is safe. We act in self-protective ways…To hide means to remain safe, to hurt less. And so by hiding, we take matters into our own hands. We don’t return to our God with our broken and desperate hearts. And it has never occurred to us that in all our hiding, something precious is also lost.

*all our controlling and our hiding and our indulging actually serves to separate us from our hearts. We lose touch with the longings that make us women. And the substitutes never, ever resolve the deeper issue of our souls (pg 58)

*The damage done to our feminine hearts through the wounds we received is made worse by the horrible things we believe about ourselves as a results (pg 68). The wounds you receieved came to you for a purpose from one who knows all you are meant to be and fears you (pg75)

*Many women fear that somehow they are not enough. Deep down we fear that there is something wrong with us. If we were a princess, wouldn’t our prince have come? If we were the daughter of a king, wouldn’t he have fought for us? We can’t help but believe that if we were different, if we were better, then we would have been loved as we so longed to be (pg69)

*We know we are not all that we long to be, all that God longs for us to be, but instead of coming up for Grace-filled air and asking God what he thinks of us, shame keeps us pinned down and gasping, believing that we deserve to suffocate (pg 73)

*From Eve, we received a deep mistrust in the heart of God toward us (pg 75)

*We believe we are not worthy of pursuit, so we hang a “do not disturb” sign on our personalities, send a “back off” message to the world. We don’t feel that we are irreplaceable, so we try and make ourselves useful. We try so hard, and in so many ways, to protect our hearts from further pain (pg80)

*Most of us are living with the guilt that somehow it’s out fault we aren’t more deeply pursued. We believe we don’t have an essential role in a great adventure. That we have no beauty to unveil. The message of our wounds is always this, “This is because of you. This is what you deserve.” (pg85)

Scripture journaling

2009-04-22T12:53:00.000-07:00

I'm taking a class at church that requires us to journal 5 days a week on something we read in scripture. Usually...loving to write...that is an easy concept for me. SOME DAYS, however, my mind is sooo blank and I can't think of anything at all. Our Pastor's wife, Donna (who is teaching the class), gave us an idea to help out (and I thought it would also help those NEW to journaling and studying their Bible that way. Anyway, it's based off the acronym SOAP

S-Scripture
O-Observation: Just what is it saying?
A-Application: How can we use that info today?
P-Prayer: Write this out as your prayer...what is your prayer regarding the area this piece of scripture addresses?

Anyway...this has REALLY helped me on those days so I wanted to share!

Blessings!
Jenn

God's Path

2009-03-25T13:00:00.001-07:00

1) The Lord says, “I will guide you along the best pathway for your life. I will advise and watch over you.” Psalm 32:8
2) “The Lord directs the steps of the godly. He delights in every detail of their lives.” Psalm 37:23
3) “I will bless the Lord who guides ne; even at night my heart instructs me. I know the Lord is always with me. I will not be shaken, for he is right beside me.” Psalm 16:7-8
4) “God arms me with strength, and he makes my way perfect.” Psalm 18:32
5) “But true wisdom and power are found in God; counsel and understanding are his” Job 12:13
6) “The Lord will work out his plans for my life; for your faithful love, oh Lord, endures forever.” Psalm 138:8
7) “Trust in the Lord with all your heart…lean not on your own understanding. Seek his will in all you do, and he will show you which path to take.” Proverbs 3:6

Ever feel like God is REALLY trying to tell you something? Yeah…me too…like 7 Bible verses worth trying to tell me…HAHAHA. Lately, I’ve been working on REALLY seeking God, his direction, his voice, his plans for me, his will for my life, his character. I’ve been trying to “seek God will all (my) heart,” as the Bible suggests we do, and let me say, it has been a WILD ride.

At first, it was very scary. It’s never been easy for me to trust AND I am a self-professed control freak, so relinquishing that to ANYONE…even God, was a concept that I REALLY TRULY struggled with. I was confessing every day with my mouth, that I trusted God, but inside, the enemy was feeding on the things inside me that protested against this. My insecurities grew bigger and my desire to control grew stronger, as my world whirled more and more out of control. At one point, I felt as if everything was swirling around me at tornado like speed and it was all I could do to put one foot in front of the other and walk. With that, remained the fear.

Despite the fear, however, I found myself practicing obedience. Even though it was hard to drag myself out of bed, I still prayed diligently, read the Word daily, and committed to being obedient, even if I didn’t FEEL like it. As I began to practice obedience and fight against my own emotions, something began to happen. God….as I let him be God in my life…began to take control (okay, if I admit it, he really had control ALL along). One thing that I was dreading getting involved in, cleared itself up without my help or contribution (other than prayer on the subject). Many little things began to come together in a more orderly fashion. Things started to change, and although I still have many areas of my life that are beyond my control, I have felt, the last week or so, an almost peaceful stillness, as I’ve realized just how much God will reveal and do as I TRUST.

At that point of realization, obedience turned to trust and trust became Faith, and I now KNOW, beyond a shadow of a doubt, that I am held in the palm of my Lord and Savior, and as it says in Psalms, he will not permit me to “slip”. I am in the surest, most capable grip imaginable, and for one of the 1st times in my life, I am okay with the out of control parts of my life, b/ c I am focused on the one who is IN control.
As I started to focus more, God began to bring the above Bible verses to me. I feel like it’s his way of reminding me that I’m on the right path…HIS path. That he will work it out and he will take care of it, if only I’ll seek him and his will at all times. What an incredible reassurance. I love it!

Until next time…take care and God Bless!

A Still Small Voice

2009-03-17T12:18:00.001-07:00

Can I just say, God and I have had an interesting week. I’ve been working lately on seeking God wholeheartedly, and bending to HIS leading and guidance. One of the areas of my Christian walk that I have always struggled with, is listening to the “still small voice” of God within. I am a self-professed noise addict! First thing in the morning when I get up, my IPOD goes in my ears. As soon as my students walk out the door, it’s back in my ears until bedtime or someone interrupts. At night, I sleep with a fan on all year round (no…I don’t point it at me in the winter) b/c I can’t SLEEP in SILENCE. On the weekends, if I don’t have to get up, I’ve even been known to sleep with my IPOD on my head!!

Okay..bringing this back to God, I KNOW God speaks to me various ways. He has ALWAYS reached me through illuminating a piece of scripture or opening my eyes to a daily devotional I happen to be reading, or even through other people at times, but listening for that still small voice, I have trouble with that. I can’t still my mind no matter HOW I try.

Since moving out to the country (and breaking my leg), I’ve found stillness an easier concept. Out on my backyard swing, with green grass waving around me, I have found a peace and stillness I’ve been missing for a while. Sooo…I've been practicing all week,being still and listening for God’s voice (John 10:27-My sheep hear My voice, and I know them, and they follow Me). But as I’ve been faced time and time again with nothing but silence, I began to be SOOOOO frustrated. I've ranted and raved and yelled at God "Why are you sooo silent!" I've felt like a fraud and doubted my ability to teach Sunday school. I figured how can I teach kids these things if my faith is so weak that I can't even do what I teach them to do every week!

I’ve also apologized and cried out in repentence, and recognized that it was most likely either 1) God was teaching me something through the silence, or 2) My spiritual ears were not open b/c I didn’t really come to God BELIEVING he wanted to speak with me.

Then, yesterday, I opened my lesson for the breakout class I teach on Monday nights, and yeah..you guessed it…it was on being quiet and listening for the STILL SMALL VOICE of God!! (sooo not kidding!)

"Okay God, you must surely have a sense of HUMOR, b/c how can I teach these kids about something I have never experienced?"I wrote in my journal Monday morning as I prepared. I felt so unworthy...I almost even called my children's ministry director to talk to her about it...that's how strongly I felt. Somehow, though, I knew I was meant to teach this lesson...even if just for me. I kept thinking of 2 Corinthians 12:9 which says,

And He has said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for power is perfected in weakness." Most gladly, therefore, I will rather boast about my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may dwell in me.

So last night, I accepted the challenge and taught the lesson. As I was teaching, God gave me words I didn't even know I possessed! We had a time of worship and quiet time in the middle, and let me tell you, Satan fought this one hard.
First, all we could hear was the noise from the rooms on either side of us…so…we took them outside to sit.
Next…cars started pulling up and people starting getting out of their cars and chatting…TOTALLY distracting us.

I started to think, “what a wash” b/c it seemed we would get nothing out of this, BUT THEN, I suddenly KNEW what to do.

I ushered the kids back inside, sat them down, and what followed, was I think one of the best, most honest conversations we have ever had. We talked about how hard it is to block out life’s noise and different ways we can do that (like meditating on your own breathing until that’s all you hear) I even admitted to the kids the struggles I had as an adult and we talked about how they will continue to grow in God their whole lives. Through the whole thing, I found myself telling them over and over not to grow frustrated if they don't hear from God right away. As those words left my mouth, I felt like God was telling ME that too. It was so amazing.

Then, this morning, I was sitting having quiet time, and my alarm went off (I time my morning devotional time so I'm not late to work). Once again, met with silence, I was frustrated, but something told me to give it five more minutes so I reset my alarm. In the quiet of those moments, I heard very clearly,

"Your enemy, the devil, is like a prowling lion...seeking whom to devour...read that chapter" (1 Peter chapter 5 for anyone interested)

Quickly I looked up that chapter in my Bible, and read these words of wisdom

-Care for the flock God has entrusted to you (i.e. my Sunday School and breakout kids)

-God opposes the proud, but favors the humble (I think in a way, this was his reward for my humility in admitting to the kids that I don’t even have it all together as an adult)

-Give all your worries and cares to God because he cares for you (this is something else I’ve been working on lately)

-Stand firm in your faith (didn’t I say earlier I was doubting myself all week?)

-after you have suffered a little while, he will restore, support, and strengthen you, and he will place you on a firm foundation (I feel like he blessed me with ALL of these!!)

I’m not sure where my path with God will go from here, but I am taking it one day at a time and learning to lean on him more and more each day. God is revealing himself to me in ways that I could never have imagined, and I feel as if I’m growing daily. And to think…this all started from a storm…a storm I’m still in the middle of in some ways, but with God’s hand of peace upon me, I am finding that I have shelter from the storm and a place where it is warm and safe and dry. The enemy…roaring lion that he is…will come back to attack again…but with my full armor on(Ephesians 6), I am ready to do battle! Praise God!

Gratefulness March17th

2009-03-17T07:04:00.000-07:00

54) I am grateful for Spring sunshine…I got to enjoy it this weekend out on my backyard swing.

55) I am grateful for my students. They are the lights of my life and they quite literally sometimes, get me through the day (with God’s help of course).

56) I am grateful to have neighbors who are some of my closest friends in the world (even if Manny DOES tell on me…I was NOT walking on my foot…okay…maybe I was…)

57) I am grateful that Nilda made me do my taxes….nice refund!!

58) I am grateful that God gave my mom a wake-up call (with the help of my sissy…stay strong chica!)

59) I am grateful for my morning email devotionals…the men and women who write those posts have a way of reaching in and speaking to my heart and reminding me to let God be God.

60) I am grateful for my breakout kids. They love and share so unconditionally (and they clean a mean car! Hahaha…service project!)

61) I am grateful to be surrounded by such wonderful loving couples. Matt/Kelli, Nilda/Manny, Renee/Chad, Mel/Mike, Stacy/Bobby, Jacob/Jessica, Cathy/Neil…I could go on for awhile here LOL…you guys have shown me so much about what love is and how to work through the tough stuff together. I can only hope to find some day what you all have found with each-other.

62) I'm grateful to be IRISH today LOL...gotta love the corned beef and cabbage!!

Where I stood...

2009-03-16T17:05:00.000-07:00

This song (the one you hear playing on my blog) seems to describe me lately. Can't get it out of my head...

Where I Stood
By: Missy Higgins

I don't know what I've done
Or if I like what I've begun
But something told me to run
And honey you know me it's all or none

There were sounds in my head
LIttle voices whispering
That I should go and this should end
Oh and I found myself listening

'Cos I dont know who I am, who I am without you
All I know is that I should
And I don't know if I could stand another hand upon you
All I know is that I should
'Cos she will love you more than I could
She who dares to stand where I stood

See I thought love was black and white
That it was wrong or it was right
But you ain't leaving without a fight
And I think I am just as torn inside

'Cos I dont know who I am, who I am without you
All I know is that I should
And I don't know if I could stand another hand upon you
All I know is that I should
'Cos she will love you more than I could
She who dares to stand where I stood

And I won't be far from where you are if ever you should call
You meant more to me than anyone I ever loved at all
But you taught me how to trust myself and so I say to you
This is what I have to do

'Cos I dont know who I am, who I am without you
All I know is that I should
And I don't know if I could stand another hand upon you
All I know is that I should
'Cos she will love you more than I could
She who dares to stand where I stood
Oh, she who dares to stand where I stood

Thank God for girlfriends!

2009-03-16T16:46:00.000-07:00

After a very down Saturday (just when you think you are doing a good job weathering life's storms, they hit you unaware, and you're left down on your knees), my nextdoor neighbor/ Northern CA BFF Nilda grabbed me on Sunday and said,

"You need a girls day!"

So Sunday, after spending some morning time with God, we headed out to Visalia for some girl-style pampering (I got my eyebrows waxed for the 1st time ever...OUCH!!), and some new clothes shopping (badly needed by both of us). It was the first time I've really been out and about since I broke my foot almost 2 months ago, and it felt GREAT!

It's soo amazing how God always knows what we need. I almost backed out on Nilda on Sunday...I didn't feel like changing out of my sweats or leaving the house, but in the end, I had one of the best days I've had in a long time, complete with great conversation...yummy Starbucks coffee, and buying an Easter dress in the smallest size I've worn since High School! I needed a day to recharge and just feel like a GIRL, and God knew that. Love that about him!

Anyway...Today I am thankful for my girlfriends...who put up with me, love me like crazy, and without whom I would be lost. You chicas rock! Now that reminds me...I have to get back to my Monday blessings!! Have to look and see what number I'm on...

Hearing God in a stranger's words

2009-03-10T17:20:00.000-07:00

Wow…God is on a roll with the revelations today! Okay, so I was rereading my blog from earlier (when I write, I often get in such a “zone” that by the time I’m done writing I have no idea what I actually wrote, so I tend to reread), and suddenly I was struck by what the man I met this morning said to me, and its parallel to God and what he tries to get across to us. You see, to recount real quick, I was trying to hobble back to my classroom on my crutches, when a kind stranger smiled and said:

“You’re heading to that door over there right? I’ve watched you struggle with that door for about a week now. Here…let me get that for you.”

When you think about it, isn’t that the point God tries to get across to us? When problems arise, we often try to solve them on our own or deal with them in our own strength. There have been plenty of moments when I’ve struggled with a few “doors” in my life. I’m a self proclaimed bleeding heart, who wants to save everyone all the time. I’m also a control freak who has to make sure everyone and everything around her is running smoothly. In fact, I remember a few weeks ago, telling a friend of mine I was feeling helpless about a certain situation because I myself couldn’t do anything, and he looked me in the eye, and said,

“So in other words, you aren’t trusting God to handle it…you’re out there doing it on your own strength?”

Ouch! His words stung, but they were kind of true. Maybe I’m NOT the one God wanted to solve that problem or deal with that situation, and by giving myself a measure of value in the situation, I would be taking away from what HE wanted to do or reveal through it. Still following me? Okay…hope so.

Well I think during those times…the ones where we are struggling to hold it all together. (The ones where we feel helpless because we broke our foot, our mom just got arrested, we just lost our job and quite possibly made the biggest mistake you could ever make by telling someone something you most likely never should have...oops, I promised not to list my woe is mes…stopping now).
During those times, I believe he whispers to us,

“Hey…I’ve watched you struggling with that for awhile now…here…let me get that for you.”

The problem is, as confusing and frustrating and maddening and down right heartbreaking these storms of life can be, there OURS right? Give it up? Really? Okay God…you’re saying you want me to just hand this over to you, and have PEACE, because you got it? (Okay raise your hand if you were that kid who always did all the work on a group project b/c no-one would do it as well as you? haha…mine’s up too). Yeah.…easy to say, not as easy to do. BUT, to be free…to really be free, that’s EXACTLY what we need to do. If there’s one thing I’ve learned about God over the years, it’s that he is faithful to his promises. So here’s a few of his promises to meditate on:

1 Peter 5:7 Give all your worries and cares to God, for he cares about what happens to you

Lamentations 3:32 Though he brings grief, he also shows compassion because of the greatness of his unfailing love. For he does not enjoy hurting people or causing them sorrow.

Romans 8:28 And we know that God causes everything to work together for the good of those who love God and are called according to his purpose for them.

Romans 8:35-37 Can anything ever separate us from Christ’s love? Does it mean he no longer loves us if we have trouble or calamity, or are persecuted, or hungry, or destitute, or in danger, or threatened with death? (As the Scriptures say, “For your sake we are killed every day; we are being slaughtered like sheep.”) No, despite all these things, overwhelming victory is ours through Christ, who loved us.

Phillipians 4:13 For I can do everything through Christ, who gives me strength.

Isaiah 40:31 But those who trust in the LORD will find new strength.They will soar high on wings like eagles.They will run and not grow weary.They will walk and not faint.

And those are just a FEW of the MANY verses that God speaks to us! I pray that you all are blessed and you remember to get down…and look up!

In the Midst of the Storm

2009-03-10T12:17:00.000-07:00

2 Corinthians 4:6-9 For God, who said, "Let light shine out of darkness," made his light shine in our hearts to give us the light of the knowledge of the glory of God in the face of Christ. But we have this treasure in jars of clay to show that this all-surpassing power is from God and not from us. We are hard pressed on every side, but not crushed; perplexed, but not in despair; persecuted, but not abandoned; struck down, but not destroyed.

Ever feel like you are being “hard pressed on every side”? Yeah...I know the feeling. Life has been like that for me lately. It seems like everywhere I turn, disaster is striking…some of it of my own making…some of it not…but all the same, it’s all at once and it’s intense.

I won’t bore you with my “woe is me” story, because this is not of story of the storm, but a glimpse of the rainbow. You see, It says in verse 6 that God made his “light shine in our hearts to give us the light of the knowledge of God.” and this morning, one of the things I came to understand about God, once again, is that he is there even when we feel like the storms of life are taking over.
You see this morning, all the storms in my life came to a head, and I found myself in my classroom crying, dreading facing my day, crying out to God to show me that he was with me and he wouldn’t leave me and he would take care of me. I begged him to restore my peace and assurance and take away a bit of the pain. Then…he did just that. Instant answered prayer.

It all started with the act of a stranger. I was returning to my classroom after making copies, trying to keep the plastic smile on my face, dreading the start of the day, when the parent of a child (a man I’d never even seen before) smiled the nicest smile in the world and said,

“You’re heading to that door over there right? I’ve watched you struggle with that door for a week now. Here…let me get that for you.”

He retraced his steps, politely opened the door, wished me a good day, and retreated. Instantly, my smile returned and a little of my joy crept back in. I stood in my empty classroom, peered up at the heavens and thought to myself,
“Wow…I wonder if that man had ANY idea of the impact he just had on my day. Here I was, having the worst day in the world, and with one tiny act of kindness, he began to turn my whole day around” (I also resolved in that moment to look for ways to do the same for others…you never know who might NEED it).

Then, later on during our poetry writing (we were writing Cinquains), one of my students (my “husband”) decided that he was going to write his about me. Now usually this student cannot focus on anything and never finishes his work. Today however, not only was he the 1st one done (and VERY proud of himself for once for staying on task), but when he was finished, he handed me a poem that brought tears to my eyes. This is what he wrote me:

Ms. Crone
Nice, beautiful
Gives hugs, writes, jumps
Is my best friend
Teacher

It was as if God was reminding me that if I keep my focus on him, he will show me that he is still there despite ANYTHING going on in my life. He is there in the kind act of a stranger, in the smile and hug of a child, in the words (or text) of encouragement from a friend, in the lyrics to a song. Yes, we may be “struck down” as this verse suggests, but we are not Destroyed, for God is always with us.
Someone very close to me reminded me this morning that “God is more concerned with our character than our comfort,” and as I find myself trusting him more, seeking him more earnestly and learning to see how his hand is in EVERYTHING, I understand that. If I had not been in this storm, those little blessings might have been overlooked, gone by unnoticed, and what a shame that would be. So I am thankful for the storm, because in the midst of the storm, I am learning to look to the one who calmed the seas with just a wave of his hand, and there is NO better place to be than at his feet.

Blessings!

Jenn

Waiting on God

2009-03-10T12:16:00.000-07:00

I am still confident of this: I will see the goodness of the Lord in the land of the living. Wait for the LORD; be strong and take heart and wait for the LORD Psalm 27:13-14

I was talking to my sister last night, about waiting on God and trusting him, and an email came through in the middle of the conversation, titled, “Waiting on the Lord”. This can’t be coincidence I told her, as we read through the email together. The author was using the age old “should I marry him/her” question as a platform to say that God sometimes says “yes” or “no” to prayer, but often, his answer is “Just wait”.

She talked about how much we hate waiting on ANYTHING, even God, but that we need to stop and realize that God sees far beyond what we see, and in the WAITING, God can do things he can’t do in any other season of our lives.

It’s funny, that topic seems to be coming at me more and more lately…the idea that God sees far beyond what we see and we need to, as my friend Stacy says, practice being a F.R.O.G (Fully relied on God). It’s been the subject of two emails I’ve gotten in the last week, a conversation with two different friends, and I even spoke about with my Sunday School 5th graders this week, b/c we were talking about trusting God and doing what he tells us to do (I was telling them in kid terms, that if God whispered to them that they needed to invite that certain kid to church and they were afraid b/c they really didn’t know the kid, they had to realize that God saw far beyond what they see and he has his reasons…there was something inside that kid that God saw that they could not). We went on with other examples, but the basis of the whole lesson was “TRUST”. Trusting God NO MATTER WHAT, and listening to what he tells you to do.

With my Sunday schoolers, we were talking about Moses and the burning bush and how Moses gave God a million excuses as to why he couldn’t lead the Hebrew people and God answered EVERY single one of them. Then FINALLY, when Moses probably thought he had exhausted God, he told him,

“But God…I am slow to speech (Moses had a BAD stutter), How can I possibly lead a nation?”

And God replied,

“#1: You are forgetting that you are talking to the very one who gives speech or sight and takes it away at his will.”

And

“#2: If that doesn’t satisfy you, don’t worry..I’ve already talked to your brother Aaron who we both know is pretty eloquent, and you can tell HIM what I’ve told you and let him be your mouth piece”

God was trying to get Moses to understand that he needed to TRUST God and just obey him. God saw ahead to the ten commandments and the plagues and the parting of the Red Sea. God saw FAR beyond what Moses could see and he just wanted Moses to say “OKAY”.

So…back to the idea of waiting on God. Yeah…waiting is hard. We live in a “get it now” society that won’t wait for anything. Most people I know base where they eat, where they shop, where they go to the movies, even which bathroom they use, on how long the lines are! We HATE to wait! When it’s GOD telling us to wait, I think it’s even worse, because the questions are bigger…the stakes higher. BUT God does ask just that of us sometimes. He is teaching us…training us…molding us…shaping us in the waiting, in a way that can only be done in that moment. He wants to know if we are going to stand there and stamp our feet and demand answers, or if we will simply lift our hands to him in worship and surrender. It’s in the waiting that we are refined and changed. It’s in the waiting that God does the dirty work. So in this case…waiting is definitely worth it. Next time you are tempted to think otherwise, meditate on these:

Wait for the Lord; Be strong, and let your heart take courage; Yes, wait for the Lord Psalm 27:14

For evildoers will be cut off, But those who wait for the Lord, they will inherit the land. Psalm 37:9

And those who have knowledge of Your Name will put their faith in You; because you, Lord, have ever given Your help to those who were waiting for you Psalm 9:10

When I was waiting quietly for the Lord, His heart was turned to me, and He gave ear to my cry Psalm 40:1

And so, as the result of patient waiting, our forefather obtained what God had promised Hebrew 6:15

This vision is for a future time. It describes the end, and it will be fulfilled.
If it seems slow in coming, wait patiently,for it will surely take place. It will not be delayed. Habakuk 2:3

Kds say the darndest things

2009-03-03T15:11:00.000-08:00

So my students are constantly saying humorous things (many times w/out them even realizing it). Today I had two such occasions that I wanted to share with you :o)

#1: This falls under the category of "Things you never want to hear your students say" LOL. One of my students comes up to me today holding a book she was reading about animal moms and babies. She looks at me and says,

"Miss Crone...how can you tell the difference between a boy cat and a girl cat?"

After nearly choking on my own saliva, I managed to quickly say, "You know, they just look different."

I thought that would work until she said, "How do they look different?"...she really is a precocious child. Finally I said,

"oh... ask your mom."

So that was this morning. THEN, this afternoon, we were cleaning out desks, and my six year old husband says, "Hey MIss Crone. I know why you like Superman!" He gestures for me to lean down so he can whisper in my ear and when I do, he whispers (loudly) "It's because he's HOT

HAHAHA-Kids are funny!

I was tagged on!!!

2009-02-25T19:15:00.000-08:00

So I let my kids write on my cast today! I should have done that weeks ago...now it has character! LOL I get it cut off tomorrow, and a new one put on. My students voted on blue this time, so that's exciting. New cast...new color....no new fun...still sucks to get around on them hahaha! Thank God I have AMAZING friends, a WONDERFUL family and INCREDIBLE students to help out!

Rainbows and Rain

2009-02-25T12:58:00.000-08:00

Sometimes...in the middle of an ordinary day, God does something that absolutely astounds me and reminds me that NO day is ordinary, that God's hand is on each day and he is always present. This was the story a few weekends ago. Rain was pouring from the sky like you wouldn't believe, when I noticed the sun shining ahead of me.

"You know what that means," I said absentmindedly, "Must be a rainbow somewhere."

Unconsciously, I turned around, looking for the little "rainbow" in my mind, and GASPED! Behind the car was the LARGEST, MOST BRILLIANT rainbow I had ever seen! It was so bright that you could quite literally see EVERY SINGLE rainbow color in crystal clear precision. Just to the right of it, was a second rainbow.

"Turn around!" I screamed at my mom, grabbing her arm, "I HAVE to get a picture of this!"

She turned the car around and parked off to the side of this deserted field, and for a minute, neither of us spoke. We just sat there...enjoying God's creation.

I love moments like that...reminders that someone much more capable than me is in control. My prayer for us all, is that we always remember to see the "rainbow" through the rain. Keep your eyes on God and know that he is more than capable.

PS-I wish you could TRULY see how beautiful this was, but I didn't have my reg. camera (surprisingly), and this was taken on my camera phone! Anyway..enjoy!

One liners....

2009-02-19T16:38:00.000-08:00

BEST LINES SO FAR ABOUT MY FOOT AND/OR CRUTCHES (More to be added later)

“Hey…is your foot in two pieces in there?” 1st grade student-my class

“Hey hopalong…how’s it going?”-Co-worker Monica

"Serrrioussly...can I bedazzle your crutches?" co-worker Kelly

“Is Miss Crone wearing a cast because her foot came off?” 1st grade student-someone else’s class

“I’m not laughing at you…I swear! It’s all in love” My friend/coworker Susan

“HEY! How come you are still faster than me on those things?” My 4 year old "niece" Jocelyn

“Hey…how’s your friend the happy broken girl?” The secretary at the podiatrist to Nilda

“Honey…I don’t think your foot is supposed to bend like that” Nilda

"Sweetie..it's like your foot is waving at me." Nilda

"You are taking this sympathy thing WAY too far" Krissy (who recently had her big toe amputated on the SAME FOOT as my broken one)

“You keep sliding across the floor like that and you are going to land on your butt” Mom

“If your armpits start hurting, you should put Maxi-pads on the tops of your crutches”-Co-worker

“Hey Miss Crone…my sister had CRUNCHES once too”-1st grade student-my class

"Mama Mia..you got a bad bone in there! I need to beat it up!" My 2 yr old "nephew" Luke

Eat, Drink Tea...and get married??

2009-02-19T16:11:00.000-08:00

Today one of my students came to me, proudly waving the pink, "Princess Tea Party" flyer I had passed on on Tuesday in her hand. She giggled, as she talked about wearing her "snow-white" dress and being able to go to the Gala at the Civic Center later this month. After describing her dress to me, she looks up and says,

"Miss Crone...are we getting married at this party?"

"What..." I returned..."would give you the idea that you would be getting married at a children's tea party?"

She smiled, still clutching the announcement, and said,

“My mom read this too me and guess what? It says we are going to dress up and get married!!”

I took the paper from her hands, smoothed it out, and began to read. Suddenly, I burst out laughing. She was right...well in a way! Right in the middle of the page, it said,

"Come eat, drink and be merry.”

HAHAHA, her mom had READ it to her, and what she had heard was

"Come, eat, drink, and be MARRIED"

OH MY GOSH! That was too cute not to share! I hope you enjoyed it as much as I did!

Seek Ye First

2009-02-19T16:09:00.000-08:00

“Seek God’s face instead of seeking to understand. Trust that God will give you insight and understanding when the time is right. Until then, he’s developing your faith in him.”
(Rick Warren from www.purposedrivenlife.com)

When I was a child, there was an answer my mom gave A LOT that I hated. It went something like this,

“Because I’m the parent and I say so!”

Being the precocious child I was, I would inevitably get myself into EVEN MORE trouble as I stampeded around DEMANDING my mom give me a “rational” answer.

“But that’s not fair!” I’d often shout, “At least give me a reason why!”

“Because I’m the parent.”

“Because I’m the parent? What kind of answer is that? Tell me why!”

This could go on for awhile, before I usually got sent to my room. In fact, looking back at it, my mom sure had her hands full!

But that kind of thinking, was how my brain worked! Growing up, I always, “had to know” When I got bronchitis, I was the one looking it up in the medical book so I knew what the infection would do to my body and how EXACTLY the antibiotics worked to cure it. When I was a small child, I broke SO MANY of my toys, because I would dismantle them in an effort to find out EXACTLY how they worked. As I grew, these (and the fights with my mom) were my desire for an answer I could wrap logic and rationale around.

As I grew up,although my curiosity remained, I thought I put many of these things behind me (like the whiny child behavior). Recently, however, I was blown away during a moment of revelation. Here…let me paint you a picture:

Night had fallen, and I was wrapped in a soft green blanket, swaying back and forth on the swing in my backyard. As tears streamed down my face, I raised my eyes to heaven and uttered two words,

“Why God?”

The answer returned to me was this,

“Because I’m the parent and I say so.”

“Give me a rational answer! What kind of answer is that? I want to know why! WHY?”

Whoa! Talk about a flashback! Here I thought I had left these tendencies behind me, but suddenly I was that whiny child again, only THIS TIME, I was demanding of my HEAVENLY FATHER instead of my EARTHLY MOTHER.

My own words came back to me as I said the same exact thing to God in my moment of weakness and distress. Here I was, attempting to argue with my heavenly father and DEMAND he give me an answer to some pretty serious questions. I think, as humans, it is our inclination to want an answer that we can wrap our hands (or at least our logic) around. We get angry or upset, or frustrated when God replies,

“You don’t have to know. It’s because I’m the dad and I know what’s best.”

That’s why this quote struck me so deeply. Instead of demanding God change HIS answer, I need to work on changing MY perspective. It’s time I realized that God sees FAR BEYOND what we see and I need to trust in that and not beg for answers I might not even be ready for or need at the time being.

Rick Warren says, “Seek God’s face instead of seeking to understand”

How many times have I come to God simply because I wanted answers to my questions and not because I wanted to TRULY spend time with God and commune with him? How many? It says in Psalm 29,

“Give unto the Lord, the glory due his name; worship the Lord in the beauty of his holiness” (V.2)

It doesn’t say, “Come before God and ask why, why why”

But how often do we(or I)skip the praise and adoration and worship, and go straight to the “listen to me” part. But the Bible says CLEARLY that God deserves our worship. Again, in Psalm 95, it says,

“Come let us worship and bow down; let us kneel before the Lord our maker.” (V.6)

So it seems Rick Warren is right. We need to release the “why” and simply worship and enjoy God for who he is. I don’t have to KNOW…I just have to know that HE knows and let that be okay. It says in Proverbs 3:5, “Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding.” It’s time I stopped QUOTING that, and started LIVING it.

One of my other favorite sets of verses (that applies so well here) is from Romans 11and it says:

“How impossible is it for us to understand his decisions and his ways! For who can know The Lord’s thoughts? Who knows enough to give HIM advice?...For everything comes from him and exists by his power and is intended for his glory. All glory to him forever! Amen.” (V. 33-4, 36)

Those lines give me peace…those lines comfort me. It’s not my job to know…I don’t HAVE to know. I just have to trust that HE knows, and let that be okay.

Valentines Day and Materialism

2009-02-05T11:34:00.000-08:00

So why is it that talks with Friends always spur me into these thought patterns that turn into blog posts? LOL Anyway..here is the latest…

I was talking with a friend of mine about Valentine’s Day yesterday, and he happened to say,

“For once, I am glad that I am single on Valentine’s Day, because it is so expensive”

I haven’t been able to get that thought out of my head, and I wonder how many people actually dread “V-Day” because of the cost factor involved?

Why is it that we live in a society that says if you go out and buy me some ridiculously expensive piece of jewelry that I’m probably never going to wear b/c it cost so much that I’m afraid to lose it, that it shows you love me?

Why is it that the prices of roses and chocolate and all those other perishable things skyrockets at Valentines Day, yet people pay these ridiculously high prices and think that shows that they “Love” someone?

When did our society get so screwed up that people think they have to BUY love?

I can remember one Valentines Day when I was I think 17. My friend Adrian was driving me home from work on the way to pick up his girlfriend for their V-Day Date. Tucked into the back of his car, was a Teddy Bear so huge that it filled up the entire backseat, and in the teddy bear’s hands were these huge roses. The entire way there, he kept worrying that it just wasn’t “enough”, and I don’t know, maybe I’m not a typical girl, but I wanted to laugh. Instead of being impressed, I just thought it was a waste of money on something that wasn’t going to last anyway. Now I didn’t know Norma, his girlfriend very well, so I couldn’t speak for her, but I wanted to tell him,

“You know, you don’t have to go through all of this to show her you love her…there are soo many much simpler (and CHEAPER) ways of demonstrating your love. Okay, so here is my list for guys (and like I said, I sometimes wonder if I’m a typical girl…maybe not…maybe your girlfriend would like that overpriced piece of jewelry or a $100 bouquet of roses).Okay..here we go..Jenn’s list of easy ways to show your girl you love her (and none of it revolves around Valentines Day LOL):
**Note, this list is compiled from 28 years of being single and just simply observing the women and their relationships around me.

1) Okay maybe this is just me, but I am a very tactile person. I'm always ruffling the kids' hair or hugging on everyone around me. So for me, my #1 would be I would be absolutely happy if someone I loved would just walk up behind me, put their arms around me, and just stay there for awhile. There is something very comforting in the embrace of those we love. No money involved, just a total feeling of I love you enough to stay here for awhile.

2) When she talks…actually LISTEN to her. I see so many guys who check out the minute their girl starts talking, but what they don’t realize is us girls NEED this talk time. Please…even if it annoys you…listen to her.

3) Do little things to help her around the house. Again, most women will probably SWEAR that they can do it all themselves and many would never even think to ask you to help out, but secretly, they wish you just WOULD. One of the biggest complaints I hear from women is that they wish their men would do more to help out around the house. Please remember that as hard as you work, most of them do too, so they SECRETLY would love for you just to say, “Here Honey…let me do that tonight”

4) Do LITTLE things to remind her that she is special to you (examples include…tuck a quick note in her briefcase just saying “Reminding you I love you” or leave random notes around the house for her to find…make her coffee in the morning before she gets up to make yours…write with her lipstick on the mirror (trust me…she WON’T MIND cleaning up that one…although if your girl is a product girl…avoid using the expensive lipstick LOL) Let your mind have total freedom with this one…us girls love anything like that. It's scary, but many women I know often say, "I don't know what he sees in me" or they feel like they aren't worthy of being special. I often want to tell the men in their lives, "show her" but I can't because we usually talk in confidence. Sooo men...if my friends are like your ladies, they probably have the same issues. This is one way you can remind her.

5) Share with her-I know this is hard for guys to do, but we women really do want to try and understand you. When you don’t share, we are left to assume that whatever is wrong with you is our fault (and trust me, I have seen MANY women do that...it’s all about communication).

6) If you have kids…arrange a time that you can be “kid-free”. Don’t tell your lady beforehand. Now sticking with the CHEAP aspect of this post, this can be as simple as arranging for grandma and grandpa to pick up the kids and then tossing a blanket on the floor in the livingroom, putting in a favorite cd and having an indoor “picnic” with your spouse. Buy cheap foods like grapes and cheese and make it fun! Cost? Probably less than $10.

7) One of the things my dad used to do (and he is sooo not a romantic) that I thought was sweet (which is funny too b/c I am soo not a bring me flowers girl) was when-ever he was thinking of my mom, he would pick flowers from the jobsite he was on, or sometimes even from our own front lawn, and bring them in with him at the end of the work day. He never bought them, but I remember thinking it was sweet that he had picked them and then taken such great care of them between where he was and our house, just to show my mom he was thinking of her (**Note here..please don’t pick flowers from anyone’s front yard without permission…I would hate for you to get shot following my advice LOL)

8) Send her letters-Okay...how much is a stamp? I know this sounds cheesy, but admit it, you LOVE getting mail from someone you know. Who better to get mail from than the one you love? This one always pops into my mind, b/c I am way better with writing things than I am with speaking them. I can write a five page blog post or email, and I can send a four page letter, but, especially when it comes to serious stuff, I often have trouble speaking my thoughts aloud. Wanna see your girl treasure something forever? Write her letters. I can still remember reading my mom and dad’s letters from when my dad was in boot-camp and my uncle Donnie and his fiancé Candy’s letters they wrote when Donnie was in Vietnam. So sweet!

Okay, well, here’s a start. I’m sick right now, so my mind is blank, but I’ll add more on later (and ladies…feel free to comment and add to my list too!!). BUT NONE of these involve money(well, much) or an artificial Holiday that was never intended to be materialistic and money driven in nature. The LEGEND of St Valentine is so much more pure in nature than that. Read it here:

Cast Version 2.0

2009-02-04T12:14:00.000-08:00

So apparently I have something called a "Jones" fracture. Anyway..here's my new updated cast!

The power of Prayer

2009-02-01T21:46:00.000-08:00

Okay so yesterday morning I was out running, and my foot started hurting (some of you might remember that I sprained it over Christmas break). I didn't think much of it, until I was sprinting and heard a SNAP and felt something snap inside my foot (yeah I know...kinda gross...note to self...buy running shoes). Anyway, I walked home (yup...I'm not kidding) about two blocks from the Hollywood video by my house to my house, and up the stairs, and by the time I got my shoe off, I couldn't step down on my foot. I kept saying over and over "I probably just sprained it", so I put some ice on it and sat on the couch. In a funny coincidence, my phone had turned off that morning b/c apparently I had forgotten to pay the bill last month, so I had no phone service.By about hour 4 or 5, when I was still hoping around my apartment on one foot and there was a specific spot on my foot that REALLY hurt even to barely touch, the possibility of a break entered my mind and I started crying.

The rest of the evening was spent crying on and off, praying, reading my Bible, and hoping someone would come check on me (yes I know, I could have gone to a neighbor but I don't know any of them, they are never home, and a little part of me was still going "It's just a sprain...ice it and it will be fine" I was also hoping that God would show himself and bring helpto me since I kind of couldn't walk). About 8:30, I went to sleep, and when I woke up this morning, it hurt enough that I crawled around my apartment for a bit and then laid back on the couch and prayed some more. I was finally realizing it probably WAS broken, and in teh middle of praying "God please send someone to help me" when I heard a knock on the door and Nilda's voice called out,

"Jenn...oh thank God...you have everyone scared to death."

I laughed and cried at the same time and said,

"Good, b/c I kinda can't walk right now"

At this, Nilda came busting into the door and said, "What?!?"

"Yeah...I hurt my foot yesterday"

She walked fully into the room, took one look at my foot and said,

"Uh honey...your foot is NOT supposed to be bending that way."

I honestly didn't realize it was bending, and she blurted out,

"That's it, we are going to the ER"

Soo...I hopped downstairs, and within two hours, was given the diagnosis that yup...its broken. Apparently I broke the 3rd metatarsal, which is a bone that delivers a lot of blood supply to your foot, so I have to go see an Ortho doctor tommorrow and find out if #1:I have to have a full-cast put on (it's only in a half cast right now) and #2-how long i have to be off work (If its a clear break I can be out for up to 8 weeks so as not to damage the vein. If its a pseudo break...not so long).

So yeah...that was my weekend, but I thank God that I have such great friends and I am also incredibly blessed to belong to a God who can get my message across and send help my way even without cell service. There is ABSOLUTELY NOTHING like the power of prayer! BE blessed today!

Love,

jenn

A week of blessings...

2009-01-30T11:49:00.000-08:00

So it continues! Apparently God must think I need cheering up this week, because a student and her mom brought me these flowers this morning! Too cute!

Sweet Kids

2009-01-29T11:53:00.000-08:00

So it must have been "bring Ms. Crone a gift" week at school :o) One of my little girls came in with this beautiful pin and a box she decorated herself today. So sweet! You can't see the box top in the picture, but it has my name and some flowers drawn on it. First graders are so cute.

My 1st married gift LOL

2009-01-26T15:23:00.000-08:00

So my "husband" gave me these today. How cute is that? He told me

"Miss Crone...I have a surprise for you....close your eyes"

When I opened my eyes, these were sitting in my hand! That boy is too much, but he is soo adorable!

Anyway...thought you would enjoy the tale!

The student becomes the teacher

2009-01-22T16:07:00.000-08:00

I am currently typing this from a paper I wrote out earlier today…

It’s a rainy Thursday afternoon, and as I watch my 1st graders happily sharing games and puzzles with each other, I’m thinking of how blessed I am to get to do what I do for a living. How many people could truly say they love what they do for a living? I wish more of them could, because then they would know what it’s like to be in my shoes.

There is something unique to this group of students. They are the quirkiest group of students I’ve ever had. They always have something to say about anything and everything under the sun and they make me laugh every day. I also think we can learn so much from them. For example, currently, my “husband” sits playing with blocks.

“I’m building a house for you, “ he tells me with a grin.

He is going to be a great provider some day. He always looks out for me and does things to help me out. Earlier today, he drew me the sweetest picture. He is totally going to be the type to one day write poetry for the girl of his dreams...haha.
At this age, not one single child is left out or ignored. These five and six year olds have more caring and compassion in their little fingers than many adults have in their whole bodies. I love watching them interact and today is no exception. You see…in 1st grade, everyone is your best friend and everyone encourages each other to make good choices. In fact, just this morning, while doing a lesson on the carpet, one of my students looked up and told his classmates,

“Come on guys…let’s show respect.”

Instantly, twenty brilliant smiles turned my direction and hands clasped in their laps. Even Alyssa, who often has trouble following directions and sitting on the carpet, sat immediately, and the class praised her for her good decision making. How I wish the rest of the world was just as easy to convince that they need to show respect. Perhaps then, our prisons would not be as full and the world would be a happier place.

It’s funny…as I walk through the door each day, one of the 1st things I usually hear, are the words “teacher” echoing through the room (usually followed by a group of students saying ‘there’s no-one named teacher in this room”…proof that kids DO listen to everything you say LOL. It’s a title I earned the minute I walked across that threshold and accepted my credential, but the reality of the situation is, each group of students that walks through my door teaches me just as much, if not more, than I teach them. I have learned and grown and changed as a result of knowing these little people and being allowed the privilege of being a part of their world for a little while. So I wonder sometimes…who is the real teacher in this room? I wish everyone could…just for a day….sit back and see what I get to see daily, because they would see the world as it should have been before the harsh realities of life invaded.

I’m not saying they don’t face harsh realities…quite the opposite actually. I have some 1st graders with backgrounds that would astound you and who have seen more tragedy than many will in a lifetime, but what amazes me daily is their resiliency, and their ability to find the good in everything and everyone. I wish we could all learn to see the world through their eyes for a moment. Then…maybe just then….we would be transformed….into something more…something better…something beautiful. Like I said…how many people can truly say they love their job? I wish more had that pleasure.

Bran/Flaxseed Muffins

2009-01-21T12:46:00.000-08:00

**The first time I made these, I THOUGHT they would taste like cardboard, but I consoled myself with the idea that AT LEAST they were healthy (most of the oil is substituted with fruits). PLUS, I had a TON of ground flaxseed in the pantry and needed something to do with it!! However, from the moment they came out of the oven, they were moist and delicious!! Since then, this has remained one of my FAVORITE homemade muffin recipes! Enjoy!

INGREDIENTS
1 1/2 cups all-purpose flour (I usually use a cup of WHOLE WHEAT flour and 1/2 cup of reg.)
3/4 cup ground flax seed
3/4 cup oat bran
1 cup brown sugar
2 teaspoons baking soda
1 teaspoon baking powder
1 teaspoon salt
2 teaspoons ground cinnamon (I rarely measure my cinnamon bc I LOVE cinnamon)
3/4 cup skim milk (1% or nonfat is fine)
2 eggs, beaten
1 teaspoon vanilla extract
2 tablespoons vegetable oil
2 cups shredded carrots
2 apples, peeled, shredded
1/2 cup raisins

DIRECTIONS
Preheat oven to 350 degrees F (175 degrees C). Grease muffin pan or line with paper muffin liners.
In a large bowl, mix together flour, flax seed, oat bran, brown sugar, baking soda, baking powder, salt and cinnamon. Add the milk, eggs, vanilla and oil; mix until just blended. Stir in the carrots, apples, raisins and nuts. Fill prepared muffin cups 2/3 full with batter.
Bake at 350 F (175 degrees C) for 15 to 20 minutes, or until a toothpick inserted into the center of a muffin comes out clean.

A couple of great Bible Verses!

2009-01-19T13:44:00.001-08:00

1 John 5:14-16 (New International Version)
This is the confidence we have in approaching God: that if we ask anything according to his will, he hears us. And if we know that he hears us—whatever we ask—we know that we have what we asked of him.

Lamentations 3:22 (New International Version)
The LORD is good to those whose hope is in him, to the one who seeks him

SOS

2009-01-19T12:08:00.000-08:00

Imagine this....seven scoops of Superior Dairy Ice-Cream, and toppings galore! Oh yes...this is an SOS! (and No I'm not quoting the Jonas Brothers song!) Thought you'd enjoy seeing this pic (and Renee getting ready to dig in!). It took 5 people to eat this monstrosity! (Many thanks to Ryan for customizing it for us...it pays to have friends with Family at the ice-cream shop). Anyway...thanks too to Aaron for this fabulous idea!

God and Puzzles

2009-01-19T11:58:00.000-08:00

Trust in the LORD with all your heart; and lean not on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your path straight.
Proverbs 3:5-6

So I’ve had this image in my head the last few days, of life being like a gigantic jigsaw puzzle. As we walk with God, he whispers to us where certain pieces fit.

“Look at how it’s shaped,” he whispers, “See how they fit together?”

There are times when the pieces fit together easily, things fall together very simply. You know the pieces I’m talking about…the border pieces…the ones that hold it all together. I always start there when building a puzzle, because they are easy to find in the jumbled mess of my puzzle box. They have clearly defined edges that distinguish them from the other pieces. These pieces are like the cornerstones of our Christian life. We all know the big rules, the dos and donts, and I’d like to hope, that for the most part, our major morals and values are clearly defined in our lives. If not…take the time to discover what is important to you and what God’s word says, because these will become the building block that we rely on when the rest of our life gets a little fuzzy. These are also the places God gives us a little more freedom and counts on us to use what we know to make the right choice and put the right pieces together.

There are also times, however, when decisions or pathways are a little more unclear and we need to rely on God more and let him lead us through the mess. These times are like opening the puzzle box and finding a hundred pieces of blue sky. In order to fit them together, I have to take them out, examine each corner and curve, and then find the coordinating corner and curve in the matching piece. Not easy to do when they are all the same shade of blue!

Soo…the problem with me (and I’m sure many of you), is that I get impatient doing this work. My natural inclination is to bust out a pair of scissors and make the pieces fit one way or another! (ever have that urge???). When I’m walking through these blue sky times with God, I can often become frustrated at the slow pace. If I get impatient enough, I start to forget what he wants me to learn (and yes, there is always something to learn in the waiting) and I start trying to make MY OWN way through the mess. Instead of being steady and and slow and waiting for God to show me what’s next, I become hasty and irrational, and I make a big mess of things in the process. Instead of waiting for him to show me where the next piece fits, I jam it in to a place it was never meant to be in the first place.

However; something occurred to me recently. If I follow my natural inclination and break out the scissors, what happens to my puzzle? Not only is it missing pieces, but when I put the last piece in and step back to admire my work, instead of the masterpiece I expected, I will be met with a vision marred by the holes I created with my hastiness and impatience. In stead of beauty I’ll see imperfection…my will not his. For his will is perfect:

“Every good gift and every perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of lights” James 1:17

With that in mind, I thought about the fact that if I instead, take a deep breath, do the hard work, and pay attention to where each piece matches up, I will finish with a sense of accomplishment instead of disappointment. If I dig in slowly, and allow God…like a patient father teaching a very young child…to guide my hand, when I place the final puzzle piece snugly into its home, I’ll stand back and gasp in awe as all my hard work, patience, and dedication combines with his wisdom, guidance, and assurance, and I am rewarded with a glimpse of the masterpiece we have created together! Definitely a much better sight to behold!

So…what did I learn from all this? In life…and puzzle building…it’s okay to take your time and wait for the pieces to fit together the way they were meant to. If you try to force them together, you’ll just be disappointed with the results. Remember that God knows all, and that he,

“works for the good of all those who love him and who have been called according to his purpose” (Romans 8:28).

Wherever you are headed, he sees the big picture, even when you feel like you are drowning in blue sky pieces. Allow him to guide your hand and reveal to you how certain corners fit together. If you do, you’ll sleep in peace, and wake in the knowledge that God is in control and that you couldn’t ask for a better plan. And…if you get stuck…LOOK AT THE BOX (i.e. pick up your Bible)…it always helps me! May God bless you richly!

XOXO~
Jenn

An apple a day...

2009-01-16T11:59:00.000-08:00

So yesterday I was out sick. When I got to school today, I was greeted (through the fog) by twenty precious little smiles, ready to start the day. As I got a little closer, one of the smiles stood out from the rest...Rudy. His grin was unmistakeable, and pulled me toward him like a magnet. Looking up at me, he smiled sweetly and as I got closer, he whispered,

"I have a surprise for you."

"You do!" I exclaimed, expecting him to pull a drawing out from behind his back (1st graders love to draw), or some crumpled flowers he had picked from the school yard (they know they are not allowed, but sometimes...). Instead, he smiled brighter and said,

"You have to wait...it's for your desk."

I grinned back at him, my smile as wide as his, and we headed off to class. As I was busy getting another group of students ready for the day, Rudy quietly, on his way to put away his back pack, slipped over to my desk without me even noticing. As I walked by his group, checking to make sure they were all on task, Rudy looked up...little face gleaming, and whispered,

"Miss Crone look...look what's on your desk."

I slowly turned around, and there, sitting atop my desk, was a bright shiny red apple!! Now I know the whole "Teacher/apple" thing people talk about all the time, but I've never actually had a student GIVE me an apple. As I felt the prickling of tears at the corner of my eyes, I smiled down at this precious little gem, and whispered back,

"It's perfect. Thank you."

Sometimes....in the little things they do....they absolutely astound me. You see, this morning wasn't about the gift. If you knew this kid, you would know that he started the year not wanting to come to school and not caring (even in 1st grade) about his education. He was getting in fights on campus and picking on other students, and somewhere along the line, he decided to make a choice, and he made the right one. When he showed me the respect he did this morning and when I saw that pride on his face, I realized once again why I do what I do...for the ones like him. The ones I get to watch every day make a conscious choice to have a better life and be a better person than they were the day before. As teachers, we get to see so much more into the heart of humanity than many others, and I thank God for that chance, and for tiny moments like this, when I get the utter privlege of sharing in the joy and pride a child feels from making the right choice.

Grace and Growth

2009-01-13T18:04:00.000-08:00

Lately…I’ve been trying to rearrange things in my schedule and become more efficient, so I can carve out more “God” time. I am working on running to God with things first and letting him refresh me to deal with the rest or letting him gently guide me down the path I’m to follow.

I wake up in the morning…Bible in one hand, coffee in the other, and greet the day with a few words whispered from my father’s Love Letter to the world.

At night…before I rest my head, I read once again, worship with my ipod clutched tightly in my hand, and then drift off to sleep.

This is a routine that has been slowly becoming second nature to me, but, some days....especially when my day has been frustrating, I find myself saying, “I keep doing this…hoping to grow, hoping to change, but I often feel back to square one…I let the world get to me today, so the score is

World:1 Jenn’s Faith in God:0

Instinctively, when this happens, my first reaction is to be disappointed in myself for forgetting, even for a moment, that I have a God who sees all things and takes care of all things. As that negativity seeps in, it begins to impede my learning and to stunt the little shoots of growth seeping through the soil of my soul...not good.

Sooo... I’ve been working on pushing that aside, and reminding myself that I may have faltered in that one moment, BUT that I serve a God of Grace who will dust me off and set me back on the road to growth. Like Paul, I am reminded of my Savior’s words in 2 Corinthians:

But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." (2 Corinthians 12:9)

And like Paul I reply

Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me. 10That is why, for Christ's sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong.(2 Corinthians 12:9-10)

Today, with those words ringing in my head, I opened by daily email devotional, and was greeted by this:

"I am the bread of life.
He who comes to me will never go hungry,
and he who believes in me will never be thirsty."
John 6:35

FROM THE FATHER'S HEART: My child, I sense your hunger to grow. No one who seeks My presence leaves empty. I will feed you, body, soul, and spirit. Come, sit at My feet daily, and we will share together. I've baked an abundance of delicious bread you've never even tasted. My manna is not of this world, but once you eat it, you will never be hungry again. I will fill you up with Myself

How I long for that….to be so full of God that nothing of me shines through. The world reminds me daily that I can be selfish and petty and insecure and doubtful, but each night, my God whispers to me,

"Let me take away that which will harm you…and let me use the rest. I will use those things which make you weak to show my power shining through you. I will use those areas you are most insecure about to show the world just how awesome I am. I will take YOUR mistakes, and make them MY victories".

So to my Lord I say…use it…use it all. Take all of me and in return fill me with more of you. Not my will but yours be done. To you and you alone be the glory.

Amen.

My first sports injury...LOL

2009-01-12T15:32:00.000-08:00

Okay, so I don't think I told you guys that I sprained my foot over Christmas break (running in bad shoes..note to self...never run in canvas slip-ons). Well, this weekend, a bunch of us went out to the park to play flag football. Needless to say, one wrong turn sent me and my team-mate Manny careening towards each-other. In an effort to not have get the FULL force of his body, Manny turned, and collided with MY FOOT (yeah..the same one).

Of course, being the "tough" girl I am, I shook it off and kept playing. When I took my shoe off at the end of the game, my big toe and the one next to it were bleeding. By the end of the night, my toe was purple and swollen and I wound up having to drench it in ice-water (allow me to mention that it's been between 30-40 degrees at night), for about 45 mins.

Today it looks better, but I had to try on four pairs of shoes before I could leave for work this morning. My students think it's "cool", and my coworkers just laugh at me.

Anyway, the game was still lots of fun (My friend Aaron even brought real flag belts and marked off the field with cones!) and I would play again in a heartbeat (well...as soon as I can wear normal shoes again...LOL)

Married to myself!

2009-01-08T15:24:00.000-08:00

My students seem to have marriage on the mind ever since I got “married” the other day. Here’s a recap of today’s lunch line conversation….

We were walking back from lunch (Note that I had previously told several of my colleagues my lovely my student said he married me story). As he is walking by, Bravo (one of our 5/6 teachers) yells out,

“Hey Crone…where’s your husband?”

Isaiah turns around quick, and Bravo and I make eye contact so he knows who I mean and I give him (Bravo) the evil eye and then laugh. As soon as he is gone, one of my students says,

“Wait Miss Crone…do you have a husband?”

I answer,

“My name is MISS Crone…do I have a husband?”

“No” Virginia says, “But you need to get one…it would make me oh so happy. I think you should get married tomorrow!”

“Oh really,” I answer (I know…I shouldn’t let their wild imaginations run free like this hahaha), “And just who do you suppose I should marry?”

Suddenly Michaela bursts out with, “I know! You can marry yourself!”

I laugh, and tell Michaela,

“You know what, I think that’s a good idea.” (attempting to end the conversation).

Virginia, hearing Michaela’s comment, suddenly says,

“How would that work? I know! You could kiss your hand!” and proceeds to plant a kiss on the back of her hand to show me EXACTLY what she means!

At this point, Kourtney dances over (quite literally), and says,

“Miss Crone needs to get married soon and then have a wedding cheesecake! That would be so great!”

So Isaiah (my “husband”) says,

“I will make you a big chocolate cake” (thus starting the big chocolate cake Vs. Wedding Cheesecake debate of 2009).

At this point, I am trying to gain control of my overly hyper 1st graders (and stop laughing mind you), as we reach the classroom door. Suddenly my entire class starts chanting:

“Miss Crone needs to get married…Miss Crone needs to get married….married…married…married!"

I managed to quiet them down, stop the chanting, and get them in the door, but wow…what a bunch of funny little people! Sometimes they drive me nuts, but I love my kids!

My "husband" strikes again

2009-01-08T15:07:00.000-08:00

So today I was walking out on campus during lunch, and I ran into three of my students (my "husband" being one of them). I was trying to get to the office, and he stops me and says,

"You can't go!"

"Why?" I ask him, and he replies,

"Because I need to give you a kiss first!"

Oh Lord Almighty...please grant me patience with this child. I have never had a child with a crush like this! It's sweet, funny, and entirely irritating all at the same time!! Anyway, enjoy!

I'm married!?!?!?????

2009-01-06T18:05:00.000-08:00

Okay, so today we were walking back from lunch, and one of my students (who professed to me that he loved me shortly before Christmas break hahaha and who has been wearing cologne ever since we got back), gets out of his spot in line and puts his arm through mine (imagine the way you hold arms with your dad to walk down the aisle at your wedding).

Grinning, he looks at my class and says,

"Look everyone, I'm married to teacher....I married Miss Crone!"

I entertain him for a second and say,

"Oh, does that make you Mr. Crone?" and he says,

"yes"

soo... I untangle his arm from mine, pat him affectionately on the head, and say,

"Sweetie, I think you are just a little too young for me to marry you" (of course causing the DARE officer who happened to be walking by, to toss his head back and laugh).

After that, we went into the classroom and he told anyone within hearing distance, that he and I were married! At one point, one of my other students in the small group I was working with, looked at me with a confused expression on his face and said,

"Uh...Miss Crone...did he just say you were married to him?"

Which of course made me laugh, seeing the look of utter innocence on his face when he asked that, so I replied,

"Yes....he's a little too young for me, don't you think?"

"Uh...yeah." Connor replied, looking at Isaiah and rolling his eyes.

Boy was it an afternoon to remember.....

God defined worth Vs. Society Defined

2009-01-05T16:00:00.000-08:00

The Lord does not look at the things man looks at. Man looks at the outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart. 1 Samuel 16:7

Okay…I am going to rant for a second here, because I’ve had something on my mind for the past few days and it won’t go away and I promised that you would be privy to the inner workings of my mind, so I am sharing with you. I am soo tired of living in a society that places value on people merely because of their physical beauty. This is something that as an overweight girl most of my adult life, I have struggled to comprehend. Who was it, that determined that being a size six makes you “worthy” in the world’s eyes? Seriously…think about it for a minute here. If I could squeeze my butt into a pair of booty shorts or a miniskirt and look decent (which this chubby girl would never even try BTW), would that suddenly increase my value as a person? If I reach my New Years goal and lose this last 40 pounds I need to shed (for reasons of wanting to be healthy, not so that some lame guy will think my butt looks good in a pair of Levis) would I suddenly be different or be more acceptable? If I’m to be misled by the society I live in, the answer to that question would be yes. But WHY? Why have we allowed ourselves to become so misguided?

I’m sorry if I sound whiny, but I wonder if people even realize that beauty can easily fade, but what’s inside someone’s heart is what lasts. The other day, a good friend of mine (out of respect I won’t mention any names b/c it was a harmless conversation and this person had no idea it would work itself into my rant), walked in the door and suddenly burst out with,

“Who do you think are the two hottest male and female celebrities in Hollywood?”
I quickly muttered something to the nature of
“Um…I don’t know.”
But later I found myself repeating the question to myself and thinking,
“What does it matter?”

Should we seriously be devoting ourselves and our time to deciding if we think David Boreanaz or Freddie Prinze Jr. look hotter in swim shorts than Ben Affleck or whether Britney spears lost all her baby weight with a trainer or taking pills? In fact, even Britney herself mocks this idea in her song, “Piece of Me” when she says,

“Don't matter if I step on the scene or sneak away to the Philippines, They're still gonna put pictures of my derriere in the magazine”

and then later,

“I'm Mrs. she's too big now she's too thin.”

Now, I’m not the biggest Britney Spears fan in the world, but girl kinda has a point there. No one REALLY cares what she does with her life, as long as she looks good in a bikini. In fact, the biggest thing I heard when she shaved her head, was not that she was crying out for help, but “What did she do to her beautiful blond hair?” Um hello…girlfriend walked into a barber shop and SHAVED her own head, and you’re worried about the impact on her LOOKS? How messed up is that?

I mentioned this fact to my sister last night, and was told, “But you used to have a crush on Lance Bass!” and I laughed and told her,

“Do you know why I liked Lance so much? I’ll admit he is a good looking guy…I’m not denying that fact, but the reason “LANCE” became my favorite NSYNC member during that phase, was because I saw a blurb on MTV’S Pop-Up video when they first became famous, that said since the boys didn’t have time for church, Lance took his Bible with him every where he went to keep God a priority. Once I heard that, that was it for me. They could have said the same about Chris Kirkpatrick (who is decidedly less handsome than Lance), and he would have instantly become my favorite. I admired something in him…he had a quality I thought very noble, and I connected to that…his looks were a plus, not the whole reason.”

Boy am I glad that I serve a God that knows better than to place someone on a pedestal simply because they happen to be blessed with good looks. It says in this verse,

“man looks at the outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart.”

I don’t know about you, but I want to devote my time to seeing things through my God’s eyes. One of my favorite songs, “Mirror, Mirror” by Barlow Girl (get the lyrics here), talks about that same concept as they sing,

“I'm looking into the eyes of He who made meAnd to Him I have beauty beyond compare”

and again, another of my favorite songs, “Beautiful”, by Bethany Dillon (get the lyrics here) says,

“I want to be beautiful Make You stand in awe Look inside my heart And be amazed I want to hear You say Who I am is quite enough Just want to be worthy of love And beautiful”

I don’t know about you, but I want to look at the condition of my heart and the hearts of those around me, and then work on the things that will last. Can I be kinder? Can I work more on holding my tongue? Can I show compassion or help a child learn to read? Can I be a shoulder to strengthen, comfort, uplift or embrace? Can I DO something to bless someone else? When my life is over, and I stand before my God in heaven, THOSE are the things he is going to ask me about. How I looked in a bikini??….nah, that’s not even on the list.

1 Timothy 4:8: For physical training is of some value, but godliness has value for all things, holding promise for both the present life and the life to come.

HAPPY NEW YEAR!

2009-01-03T10:16:00.000-08:00

So New Year's Eve was a nice night. It started with dinner at Olive Garden with Nilda, Manny and the kids, Dustin & Julie, Leslie, Aaron, and Sancho (hahaha). After dinner (at which Nilda and I resolved to eat healthy, I had a breadstick anyway LOL..BUT, I ordered the Salmon and veggies!), we were off to Renee and Chad's for Games. The next few hours found us playing Mad Gab (my current favorite game!!) and Electronic Catch Phrase, while we waited for the official midnight announcement.

As we played, we tried (unsuccessfully), to avoid the spinach dip, M&Ms, and chocolate/peanut butter squares. We also tried (equally unsuccessfully) to avoid the chocolately rum balls Renee made (who knew Rum could be so good if you put it inside a cookie!). THIS, of course, led to a discussion on what other kinds of liquids...okay mainly what other kinds of alchohol would make good "balls" (The official winner was kahlua). This also made my friends laugh, b/c I was eating them, and I am known as the one who NEVER drinks at all. At one point, Julie told me, "I would so love to see you drunk", which made me laugh.

RUM BALLS

1 c. powdered sugar
1/3 c. rum
1/4 c. light corn syrup
2 1/2 c. crushed vanilla wafers (food processor makes this step easy!)
1 c. chopped pecans

Stir together powdered sugar, alcohol and corn syrup. Then add the crushed wafers and chopped nuts. Mix until evenly moistened and pinch a walnut sized piece and roll it firmly between the palms of your hands, repeat until all balls have been made. Then sift 1/2 cup powdered sugar and 1 tablespoon cocoa powder onto a plate, roll the balls in the powder until evenly coated.

Just before the ball dropped, champagne and Sparkling Cider flowed into cups, and we (well, Leslie and I) danced to random tunes (I tried to copy some dance moves off of these booty short wearing back up dancers, and mainly succeeded in making my fellow friends burst out laughing). At just after midnight, my two year old "date", my pseudo-nephew Luke (who has previously been sleeping), gave me a kiss and wished me a happy New Year.

At about 1am it was a quick trip with Dustin and Julie (who, along with Nilda and Manny went home) to retrieve my car, and then back to Renee's where we met up with Aaron again (who had left at like 11:15ish), and then we sipped wine (or in the boys case, beer), talked, and laughed until about 4a.m. when, after dropping off Leslie, I promptly went home and fell fast asleep.

HAPPY NEW YEAR!

Who needs presents when you have wrapping?!?

2008-12-21T13:35:00.000-08:00

Okay so I did a acually buy the kids presents...hehehe, but they loved the wrapping or "SNOW" as they called it, soo much better! These were too cute not to post!

The best Christmas present ever!

2008-12-21T13:27:00.000-08:00

On Thursday, I got a chance to go have lunch with my old fifth graders from last year. It was sooo incredible...the best Christmas present ever! Thank you Nilda and Cathy!!

The TV Generation

2008-12-16T15:08:00.000-08:00

So we had just gotten back from our Christmas program, and my students were coloring to unwind. I put on some Christmas music, and without realizing it, I am gliding across the floor, doing old-fashioned dance moves (think Fred Astair...only not NEARLY as suave..lol).

One of my students looks up and says,

"Hey..you're a ballerina!"

Before I could even respond, one of my other little girls looks up, and shouts,

"NO! NO! SHE'S DANCING WITH THE STARS!"

I could not stop laughing....wow...they REALLY ARE the TV generation.

Anyway...that's my story for today...enjoy!

Katie's Wedding

2008-12-14T19:18:00.000-08:00

So my cousin Katie and my NEW cousin Shane, finally tied the knot yesterday! Here are a couple of pics!

Just a few facts about their wedding songs:

wedding dance: amazed by Lonestar

father/daughter dance-I held her 1st By heartland

Mother/Son-Find your wings by Mark Harris

SLOW DOWN!!!

2008-12-11T16:38:00.000-08:00

One thing I can say about God…when he wants to get your attention, he sure can be persistent.

Yup...I’m back (it’s been a little busy around here this week...okay that’s an understatement…it’s been A LOT busy). Anyway, I want to share a story that goes along with the title of this blog, and what God is saying to me these days. So, the other day, I am texting with my best guy friend, Aaron, about how busy we both are and how we always seem to be running around, and he sends me this text that says: You know what? We need to slow down. As usual, I laughed and half-heartedly agreed with him (it’s my 1st year teaching 1st grade, I teach two classes at church and I’ve been going to the gym 4-5 days a week…slow down?!? Yeah right!) Anyway, I laughed it off, told him, “yeah I know…you’re right”, and went about my day.

The next morning, I open my daily devotional in my email, and what happens to be the title of the post I’m reading? SLOW DOWN! (I’m not kidding…exclamation point and all). The whole email was about taking time out of our busy schedules to spend time with God. It was written by Charles Swindoll, and one of my favorite things he said was this:

You may not have that much time available. You may have only three days, or perhaps two weeks. If you're not careful, you'll quickly fill those days with things to do, places to go, and people to see. Resist that temptation to crowd out the Lord. What a perfect opportunity to carve out time to be alone, just you, the family, and the Lord. Computer off. Fax unplugged. Cell phone tossed in the ocean.

Instead of speeding up, slow down and rethink…Don't wait for the doctor to tell you that you have six months to live. Long before anything that tragic becomes a reality, you should be growing roots deep into the soil of those things that truly matter.

Wow! Talk about some powerful words! So…after reading it, I quickly forward the devotional email to Aaron, telling him “Apparently God agrees with you, because I got this in my email today”, and then I proceeded to go about my busy day…not heeding my own advice.

Anyway, the next morning, I am up early, getting ready to read my Bible (one of the things I have been trying to be more faithful about…being daily in the WORD), and I realize I left my Bible in my classroom, so I decide to put on my ipod and worship for a bit to start my day. Okay…back to the “God is persistent” quote above, I’m getting all settled in on the couch, and the song that comes on, is “SLOW DOWN TIME” by Jeremy Camp off his new CD. Part of the lyrics to the song say:

On my own I always fade out fast,

On the run my every step will last.

I'm resting in your words that never fail.

Your searching every part of me.

I need to stop so I could hear You speak.

As I get to the chorus, which says:

I wish I could slow down time,

I wish I could wait here at your feet.

'Cause with you is the only place that I wanna be.

I know I should take it all in stride.I know you are there with every reach.

'Cause with you is the only place that I wanna be.

I find myself laughing, and I say, “Okay God…I get it!” And in the stillness of the morning, with the words of the Lord in my head..yeah…I did.

So…I am currently trying to find ways to slow down…work more productively…get more done in less time so I can have more time for myself, and above that, for him. Any suggestions??? I’m not good at slowing down, always have to be on the run…that’s how I operate. I’m the original four hours of sleep and on the run going and going and going until I hit a wall and crash girl.

But, I have learned lately that we have to be faithful in the little things before God will show himself in the big things, so I HAVE to find a way to accomplish this. I truly believe it is vital to the next phase of my walk with God. Well…I hate to say it, but I GTG…I’m off running again (and now 40 minutes behind schedule…lol). Until later…be blessed!

The Real Meaning of Christmas

2008-12-05T15:27:00.000-08:00

So my students were having this conversation this morning that I wanted to transcribe for you, because it was soo cute! Now..I didn’t actively participate in it, so no one can say I was pushing doctrine on these kids (the joy of public school), but I DID work on something for an extra two minutes to let them finish it :o). Anyway, here goes…

Child #1: Did you know Santa is watching you all the time, so you have to be good.

C#2: Yeah, we need to be good, because Santa watches if you’re good for Christmas.

C#3: Christmas isn’t about Santa. It’s about Jesus being born

C#4: Yeah. Because God…he made us…and he loves us.

C#2: Yeah. God created all of us

C#4: And you know what? God made us to say nice things to each other.

C#2: Yeah, God thinks if you don’t have something nice to say to someone, you shouldn’t say anything.

C#1: Oh yeah…so we need to be nice to each other.

After that, half my class started talking about God and Jesus being God’s son and being nice to people, until I reined them in. During the whole conversation, I had my eyes lifted to the heavens, and I wanted to cry…it was soo sweet!

I wish adults could learn from the pure innocence of children. God created us and we should say nice things to one another or nothing at all. It kind of goes back to yesterday’s Colossians reading…don’t ya think? Look at verse 8 again if you disagree. Thanks to my class for reminding me.

Colossians 3:1-17

2008-12-04T15:00:00.000-08:00

There is so much to Colossians 3, that I don’t know where to begin. I guess the first verse that pops out to me, is verse 2, which says:

And set your minds and keep them set on what is above (the higher things), not on the things that are on the earth.

I guess, on a personal level, this really hit me. I’ve been reading a lot lately, about trusting God in ANY circumstance, and while I often have the best of intentions, like many humans, I fail and fall down often and God has to remind me to walk with him and let him lead time and time again. Every time he does, I have to once again remember to set my mind on the things of God and take my eyes off the earthly or the temporal. I have to look beyond the circumstance and see God and what it means in terms of my relationship with him or my walk with him.

I am reading this terrific book by Stormie O’Martian called Just enough light for the step I’m on, and one of the things that she says in it, is that she and her daughter try and look at every circumstance through God’s eyes. When something bad happens, they immediately ask, “What is the good in this?” and they won’t stop until they find some good in the situation, because they live by Romans 8:28 which says

“God works for the good of all those who love him and have been called according to his purpose”.

With that in mind, they try…IN ALL THINGS, to fix their eyes on what is above.

As I continued to read, I was next struck by verse 8, which says,

But now put away and rid yourselves [completely] of all these things: anger, rage, bad feeling toward others, curses and slander, and foulmouthed abuse and shameful utterances from your lips!

Wow! Talk about a big one! You know, I have to say, I really do try my best not to say negative things about others, but like any normal person, I have my moments, and this verse is another reminder to me that these impulses are wrong and that I need to repent when I do go to these things. I remember once, I was trying really hard to not think negative thoughts about someone, because she had something I wanted (okay, so I’ll be a girl for a second and admit it was a guy…she was dating this guy I liked). I started to befriend her and show God’s love to her, when one of my girlfriends told me one night,

“I can’t believe you are being nice to her. She is living the life you wanted! It’s okay to hate her a little.”

At the moment she said that, I ALMOST gave in to that impulse, because a tiny part of me WAS mad that she had what I wanted, BUT, I didn’t give into it and I prayed about it, and as I did, God filled my heart with a total peace about the situation. I got a chance to see her not through the eyes of a jealous girl, but through eyes that were clear and focused on my God, and I was able to like her and have a good time with her. After all, she didn’t know I liked the guy, and it really wasn’t her fault he had chosen her. If I had given into the impulses that Satan wanted me to believe were normal inclinations, I would have missed out on knowing a great person.
Paul seems to agree with this idea as he says in verse 15,

And let the peace that comes from Christ rule in your hearts. For as members of one body you are called to live in peace. And always be thankful.

If you ASK God for peace, and truly desire it, he will grant it to you.

Finally, I want to reflect on one more set of verses. Just as Paul tells them what to turn away FROM, he also tells them what to turn TO. In verses 12-14, he says:

Since God chose you to be the holy people he loves, you must clothe yourselves with tenderhearted mercy, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience. Make allowance for each other’s faults, and forgive anyone who offends you. Remember, the Lord forgave you, so you must forgive others. Above all, clothe yourselves with love, which binds us all together in perfect harmony.

It seems as if Paul is reminding them here that the major fruits of the spirit need to be active in their lives. Paul gives the people of Colosse (and us who follow after), a tall order to live up to, but he knows…especially because of what he has heard about their faith in the past, that they are more than capable of living up to it. He is trying to bring them back to that solid ground by reminding them of the foundation of their faith. I think we can all use that reminder every now and then….

Until next time…blessings!

Favorite Christmas Songs

2008-12-03T17:57:00.000-08:00

I tend to like Non-traditional Christmas songs, so I thought I'd start a list of my favorite Christmas songs (with links to the lyrics). These were ones I thought of quickly! As I think of more, I'll add on.

1. Mary did you know?

2. Breath of Heaven (Mary's Song)

3. Who would imagine

4. Merry Christmas, Happy Holidays

5. Don't save it all for Christmas Day

6. Our God is With Us

7. Oh what a precious promise

8. The Chipmunk Song

9. Miss you Most at Christmas

10. River

Listen to a BEAUTIFUL version of this one here

11. Grown Up Christmas List

Home For Thanksgiving

2008-12-03T12:46:00.000-08:00

God's Last Name

2008-12-03T12:41:00.000-08:00

Here is a story about something that happened this morning…too cute!!

This morning we were at an awards assembly, and I handed my list of perfect attendance, good attendance, and citizenship recipients to one of my little girls to hold (she is the type that has to have something in her hands to hold because she gets antsy).

She was sitting there, examining it, and then suddenly, her eyes got very huge and she had this total look of awe on her face. She was pointing at "good attendance" and her name wasn't on that list, so I was curious as to what could possibly be causing such an enormous reaction from her. I didn't have to wait long, because within seconds, she leaned towards me, looked me right in the eye, and whispered,

"Miss Crone...how do you know God's last name?"

She had mistakenly...in her 1st grade naivety, read the word "good" as "God". It was so cute I wanted to burst out laughing or crying or a combination of both, right in the middle of our assembly. Anyway, thought you would all enjoy that one. :o)

A King is Born

2008-12-02T15:47:00.000-08:00

So every year I try to add one thing to my Christmas decor. This year (before realizing I already have one LOL, but oh well), I added a Nativity! Look how pretty!!

Apple/Sausage Stuffing

2008-12-02T15:32:00.000-08:00

Okay, I usually HATE stuffing, so this year I decided to make my own for the 1st time EVER, and it was sooo good that I ate the leftovers for three days straight! I modified the recipe just a tad, and thought I'd share:

What you need:
1 lb. sweet Italian turkey sausage
2 tbsp. butter
1 large onion, chopped
4 celery stalks, diced
2 apples, cored and chopped (I used GALA apples, although Granny Smith is traditional in stuffing recipes)
2 garlic cloves, minced
2 to 3 tsp. poultry seasoning
12 cups cubed country-style stuffing mix or 12 cups multigrain bread (24-oz. loaf), cubed and dried in an uncovered bowl overnight (I actually used the bread...left it out overnight, and then TOASTED it in the oven until it was almost a crouton consistency).
2 cups (or more) low-sodium chicken broth (I used almost TWICE that)
Salt and pepper to taste

Make it:

Step 1 Coat a large skillet with cooking spray. Brown the sausage until cooked through. Remove from heat, transfer to a large mixing bowl, and crumble sausage. (Turkey Sausage doesn't "crumble" very well, so I just cut it into Bite-sized pieces)

Step 2 Melt the butter in the skillet and simmer the onion for 2 to 3 minutes, or until translucent. Add the celery, apples, garlic, and poultry seasoning, and cook for 3 to 5 minutes, stirring often. (You can do this with cooking spray too and save on the extra calories)

Step 3 Add the apple-vegetable mixture to the bowl of sausage, along with the stuffing mix or bread; mix well. Moisten with the chicken broth and season with salt and pepper. Cool completely before stuffing the turkey. Makes 20 cups.

Step 4 Tester's tip: Stuffing can be cooked separately in a large glass casserole dish, but more stock may be needed to replace the moisture that usually comes from the turkey cavity.

Spinach-Stuffed Mushrooms

2008-12-02T15:23:00.000-08:00

What You Need
1 pkg. (6 oz.) STOVE TOP Stuffing Mix for Chicken
1-1/2 cups hot water
40 fresh mushrooms (about 2 lb.)
2 Tbsp. butter
2 cloves garlic, minced
1 pkg. (10 oz.) frozen chopped spinach, thawed, well drained
1 cup KRAFT Shredded Low-Moisture Part-Skim Mozzarella Cheese
1 cup KRAFT Grated Parmesan Cheese

Make It
HEAT oven to 400°F. Mix stuffing mix and water; set aside. Remove stems from mushrooms; chop stems. Melt butter in skillet on medium heat. Add chopped stems and garlic; cook and stir until tender. Add to prepared stuffing along with spinach and cheeses; mix well.
SPOON evenly into mushroom caps. Place, filled-sides up, in shallow baking pan.
BAKE 20 min. or until mushrooms are tender and filling is heated through.

**NOTE: I made this as a casserole and it was YUMMY! I layered the mushrooms (stemmed removed) in the bottom, added the stuffing/garlic sauteed stem pieces/spinach mixture in the middle and topped it all with the cheese before baking. I think this was my family's FAVORITE Thanksgiving addition

Easy Spinach Dip from Kraft

2008-12-02T15:19:00.000-08:00

What you need
1 can (14 oz.) artichoke hearts, drained, finely chopped or 1 cup chopped mushrooms
1 pkg. (10 oz.) frozen chopped spinach, thawed, drained
3/4 cup KRAFT Grated Parmesan Cheese
3/4 cup KRAFT Light Mayo Reduced Fat Mayonnaise
1/2 cup KRAFT 2% Milk Shredded Mozzarella Cheese
1/2 tsp. garlic powder

Make It
HEAT oven to 350°F. Mix all ingredients; spoon into 9-inch quiche dish or pie plate.
BAKE 20 min. or until heated through. Serve with TRISCUIT Reduced Fat Crackers and assorted cut-up fresh vegetables.

*Note...I actually used full-fat mayo, b/c I can't STAND the taste of RF Mayo, and I didn't have Parmesan cheese for once, so I made it without, and it was still INCREDIBLE! Oh yeah...I also microwaved it as opposed to baking it. YUMMY!!

Bible Reading Colossians 2

2008-12-02T14:44:00.001-08:00

I don't know why, but I've been drawn to Colossians 2 for quite some time. It all begins with being able to identify with how Paul feels about these people. In verse 5, he says, " though I am far away from you, my heart is with you. And I rejoice that you are living as you should and that your faith in Christ is strong." As you all know...I am not living in the town I grew up in. In high-school I was blessed to have strong christian friends who were my support and who challenged my faith and my commitment to my walk with Christ. These days, I LOVE checking in with them and seeing that they are still walking the path that will one day lead them to heaven. In fact, Kelli and I were talking a while back, about how we feel that with us, although God has lead us through so many DIFFERENT tests and trials in life, he tends to put us in the same place spiritually and emotionally in our walks with him. Even if she and I are facing completely different storms, we have a tendency to be feeling similar and so we can relate to each other and support each other through our trials. It never ceases to amaze us how God planned that all out before we ever walked into the same freshman English class together for the first time. He knew we would need that in our lives, and he planned each other to meet that specific need. So yeah...I can relate to how Paul is feeling, because I have felt that way many times.

Paul goes on from there to say in Verse 6,

Let your roots grow down into him, and let your lives be built on him

This is one of my FAVORITE verses in the Bible. In fact, I wrote a blog on verses 6-7 last month called Trust which goes into just these two verses alone.

Emphasizing his point from Chapter one, Paul reitterates in verse 9, that Christ is God in the FLESH. He doesn't want these people of Colosse to forget that Christ was not merely a prophet or a teacher, but the human representation of God and the only means to heaven. In verses 13-14, Paul tells them:

You were dead because of your sins and because your sinful nature was not yet cut away. Then God made you alive with Christ, for he forgave all our sins. He canceled the record of the charges against us and took it away by nailing it to the cross.

What a beautifully tragic image that is. Imagine your sins as if they were a living breathing part of you. All of your sins were nailed to the cross that day right along with the savior of the world. When Christ died, he was thinking of you. Can we even comprehend that? Do we pause to think about that every time we sin? I once had a friend tell me, "Every time you sin, imagine nailing Christ to the cross once again, because essentially that's what you are doing?" Wow..that really gave me a pause (esp. since this talk came right after I had sat in youth group a few weeks before and listened to a speaker describe just exactly what happens during a crucifiction). It reminds me (yes...most things tend to come back to music with me) of the Michael W. Smith Song "Above All" in which he says,

Crucified
laid behind the stone
You lived to die
rejected and alone
Like a Rose trampled on the ground
You took the fall
and thought of me
Above all

Such a powerful image...such a powerful set of verses.

Blessings~
Jenn

Sweet Potato, Apple, Walnut bake!

2008-12-02T12:20:00.000-08:00

I got this SUPER SIMPLE recipe from the craft website and it was a HIT at Thanksgiving! I changed it a bit, by adding maple syrup to the apples with the apple juice, and of course, since I love cinnamon, I added extra. I would suggest cooking the sweet potatoes for a little bit alone before covering with the apple mixture, because the apples cooked quicker and got a bit soggy by the time the sweet potatoes were done. Anyway..enjoy!

What You Need:
3 medium sweet potatoes, peeled, cut into bite-size chunks
2 medium unpeeled apples, chopped (I used Rome apples)
1/2 cup apple juice
1 tsp. ground cinnamon
1/4 cup PLANTERS Walnut Pieces

Make It:
PLACE sweet potatoes in 13x9-inch baking dish sprayed with cooking spray.

TOSS apples with apple juice and cinnamon until evenly coated; spoon over sweet potatoes. Cover.

BAKE at 375°F for 45 minutes. Uncover; sprinkle with walnuts. Bake an additional 15 minutes or until sweet potatoes are tender.

Seeing Extraordinary in the ordinary

2008-12-02T12:12:00.000-08:00

I’m not sure how well-put this will come out, because it’s hard to explain, but I wanted to share something that I’ve been walking through lately.

Something has been telling me lately, that it is time for me to change something in my walk with God. I’ve been feeling like I’m at a standstill for awhile and I don’t know what’s around the next corner, but God has been reminding me in many many ways, that he is always there, even when I can’t hear or feel him. Out of this stillness, has been born the notion that God is purposely walking me in the dark so that I will draw closer to him, because he wants to bring me to a new place in our relationship. I feel as if he is trying to bring me to a place of surrender, a place of reliance, and a place where my relationship with him becomes new and sacred again. He wants me to wait on him with expectancy and watch what he can do when I let him be who he wants to be in my life.

As this is all began occurring, I tried to think of something I could do in the waiting. I’ve been taught in the last few years that waiting on the Lord is not a passive time, but a time when we have a chance to show God who he is to us and what he means to us. So…an idea was born to try and see God’s extraordinary power working in the ordinary. I decided that I would try as hard as possible, to see God in the mundane…in the things I hadn’t seen him in before.

It started with the Fog. The fog in central CA gets very thick, and has been one of the things about living up here that literally scares me so bad I often dread leaving the house. I’ve been lucky the last two years, because we’ve had, as my native friends call “light” Fog years the last two years. Well, that all changed this year for me when #1: I got a new job that required me to drive through the country where the Fog is thicker (lack of buildings), and #2: We had thicker fog earlier than I’ve ever seen it. One night, I was driving home from a friend’s house late at night, and the Fog was so thick I could hardly see in front of my car. My first inclination was to call another friend and crash at his place because it was a lot closer to where I was than my house and the thought of driving home freaked me out. THEN…suddenly, I found the phrase “Find the extraordinary in the ordinary” running through my head, and my fear began to ease. Instead of being this big scary thing, the Fog became a symbol of our walk with Christ (and my walk at this particular time in life). There are times in our walk, when God will only shine a tiny bit of light onto a situation. Not enough to really see our destination, but enough to guide ourselves by and to stay on the course. If I applied that to the fog, I could see that as long as I held on to my “guide” (through prayer) and kept an eye on that spot I could see just in front of my car, I would make it safely to my destination. When I tried to look too far ahead (which I did once or twice in Armona), I took a wrong turn and wound up off course, but as long as I readjusted myself and kept my eyes on that small focus spot, I was okay.

Then, again today, I got a chance to see God’s extraordinary in the ordinary. My students are going to be writing letters to Santa (it’s a school wide project). Yesterday I looked online for stationary for them to write on (“santa” is returning the letters for posterity) and I wanted it to be cute but designed for younger kids to use (you know…headline, beltline, footline….teachers will understand that). So last night, after looking for what seemed like forever, I was frustrated and had planned on coming in today and making my own after school. I didn’t want to, since I have a bunch of other stuff to do, but I figured if my kids were going to write them, I had to make paper. So…I’m in the middle of reading to my kids, and two students from another 1st grade class walk in. Wordlessly, one of them hands me a paper from my coworker. As I unfold it, I realize that it’s the EXACT type of paper I had been looking for! (and I hadn’t even told Kellie that I was looking for this paper). On it was a little note “I found this, and I thought just maybe you could use it”. Once again, I was hit…like a wave, with the enorminty of just how great our God is, and how he cares about and has the ability to grant even the minutest request. I’m excited now, and I can’t wait to see what he does next! :o) I’ll keep you updated, but until then….be blessed!

Santa's Ex

2008-12-01T17:09:00.000-08:00

Okay so my kids had me in stitches today! They were talking about the weird names I've been accidently called by them (one kid once called me Mrs. Pumpkins on accident around Halloween and the story recirculates around my room every now and then). One kid said, "Can we call you Mrs. Santa Claus?" and I swerved around and said, "Wait a minute, I'm not married to SANTA!" which made them laugh hyterically.

We continue working for a minute, and then one student says, "Yeah, but he could be your boyfriend, right?" and they all burst out laughing.

"Santa is not my boyfriend, nor am I dating him." I tell my kids, and...just when I think it's over and the discussion has finished, this tiny voice in the back of the room says,

"Well, than can he be your ex-mate?"

The fact that one of my first graders would actually use the term "ex-mate" made me almost lose it I was laughing so hard. Needless to say, it took us a minute to get back to our lesson....

Grateful Monday

2008-12-01T07:23:00.000-08:00

45) I successfully cooked my first COMPLETE Thanksgiving (including home made stuffing and making the Turkey)...pics to come soon!

46) I got to reconnect with some awesome friends in southern CA that I never get to see enough! (Jacob and Jessica we are soo ON for a game of LIFE when I come down for Christmas!)

47) I just had almost a week off of work!

48) My dad gave me his ipod headphones b/c he didn’t like them (I accidently ruined mine)

49) I am grateful today for miss Kayley Alyssa who kept me in stitches on Friday and who danced with me in the middle of a shopping center!

50) I got some TERRIFIC new songs downloaded on my ipod

51) I got down to southern CA and back safely, despite being extremely tired!

52) I had a really good talk with my cousin Jason on Tuesday night

53) I have begun to be less afraid of the fog. I see it now as a reminder that I need to be fully dependent on God. The lack of sight is one of the biggest reminders to me of who exactly is in charge.

54) I am grateful for my sissy as we celebrate her birth today. HAPPY BIRTHDAY KARI! I LOVE YOU!!!

Permanent

2008-11-30T16:26:00.000-08:00

I wish you could hear this as I listen to it on my ipod. I am soo obsessed with this song!! What everyone should remember about God...no matter what...he is the same today as he was yesterday and he will be the same God tomorrow. No matter what you are walking through...even when you can't seem him in it...he is there! Beautiful way to get that point across...

Permanent
David Cook

Is this the moment where I look you in the eye?
Forgive my broken promise
That you'll never see me cry
And everything, it will surely change
Even if I tell you I won't go away today
Will you think that you're all alone
When no one's there to hold your hand?
And all you know seems so far away
And everything is temporary
Rest your head
I'm permanent

I know he's living in hell every single day
And so I ask oh god is there some way
For me to take his place
And when they say it's all touch and go
I wish I could make it go away
But still you say
Will you think that you're all alone
When no one's there to hold your hand?
When all you know seems so far away
And everything is temporary
Rest your head
I'm permanent
I'm permanent

Is the moment where I look you in the eye?
Forgive my promise
That you'll never see me cry

Beautiful

2008-11-29T22:19:00.000-08:00

I've been singing this all day...

Beautiful
Bethany Dillon

I was so unique
Now I feel skin deep
I count on the make-up to cover it all
Crying myself to sleep cause I cannot keep their attention
I thought I could be strong
But it's killing me

Does someone hear my cry?
I'm dying for new life

[Chorus]
I want to be beautiful
Make you stand in awe
Look inside my heart,
and be amazed
I want to hear you say
Who I am is quite enough
Just want to be worthy of love
And beautiful

Sometimes I wish I was someone other than me
Fighting to make the mirror happy
Trying to find whatever is missing
Won't you help me back to glory

[Chorus]

You make me beautiful
You make me stand in awe
You step inside my heart, and I am amazed
I love to hear You say
Who I am is quite enough
You make me worthy of love and beautiful

Grateful Monday

2008-11-24T19:37:00.000-08:00

25) I got ALMOST ALL my conferences knocked out today! (and they all went very very well)

26) I get to see my aunt Lori and my cousins for the first time since last Christmas tomorrow!

27) Susan (who is becoming a new friend) had gum at lunch today, so I didn’t walk into my next conference with onion and cilantro breath!

28) I got invited to a great game night on Saturday and learned three new VERY FUN games (Pit, Sound off, and Partini)

29) I had my largest group of Sunday schoolers in the last few months on Sunday and they were the BEST I had ever seen them!! Even one student I can always count on to be down and out was participating and I saw him smile for I think the first time ever.

30) I had my first weigh-in in six weeks with my trainer, and I lost nine pounds. (And my gym partner /Lemoore BFF Nilda wore a size MEDIUM the other night! So proud of her!!)

31) I got to spend some quality time with my best friend Aaron this weekend (and he gave me a bunch of blank CDS)

32) I get to see my family in a few short days and I get to COOK for Thanksgiving!

33) I get to see Kelli for the first time since May (I can’t wait to have breakfast with you)

34) Even with the holiday approaching, my students were fabulous last week!

35) I had some terrific talks with my sissy this last week! (Love you Kari!!)

36) My niece Ashley has actually been texting me lately, and it is very nice to hear from her. Kind of cute

37) I have had a lot of spiritual mentors give me really great advice this last week

38) I got a very nice email from a friend of mine (Chris) that I haven’t heard from in years. It was very sweet to read a note from her.

39) For God reminding me in about forty different ways (okay so maybe literally I think 5...not kidding) that I need to keep Romans 8:28 in mind always.

40) For my FREE trial service to the Verizon GPS navigation b/c it gave me turn by turn directions to my aunts

41) For God guiding safely through some very dense fog Saturday night in the country and to my apartment.

43) Ohio State won this weekend (GO BUCKEYES!!)

44) My Vice principal just came in and checked in on me…I feel very protected around here..it’s nice.

Third Day-Revelation

2008-11-21T12:00:00.000-08:00

I've had this song stuck in my head (well, the chorus mostly)

My life has led me down the
road that's so uncertain
Now I am left alone and I am broken
Trying to find my way
Trying to find the faith that's gone

This time I know that you are
holding all the answers
I'm tired of losing hope and taking chances
On roads that never seem
To be the ones that bring me home

Give me a revelation
Show me what to do
'Cause I've been trying to find my way
I haven't got a clue
Tell me should I stay here
Or do I need to move
Give me a revelation
I've got nothing without you
I've got nothing without you

My life has led me down this
path that's ever winding
Through every twist and turn, I'm always finding
That I am lost again
Tell me when this road will ever end

I don't know where I can turn
Tell me, when will I learn
Won't you show me where I need to go
Let me follow your lead
I know that it's the only way
that I can get back home

Thanksgiving blessing

2008-11-21T11:51:00.000-08:00

With the holiday soon approaching,yesterday,my students and I talked about giving thanks and what we can give thanks for. I even read them this cute little book titled "thanksgiving is for Giving Thanks".

So anyway, this morning, we're in the classroom, and one of my students walks up to me as he is putting away his backpack. Wrapping his little arms around me, he says,

"Miss Crone. My parents and I are thankful for you, because you help me learn."

Isn't that just the sweetest thing in the world? I swear I wanted to cry right then and there!

Just wanted to share! Hope you are blessed today!

PS-Oh yeah...apparently, b/c we made turkeys and listened to "The Wheels on the Bus" today, I am the "best teacher ever" according to my students...Aww...kids are so easy to please. :o)

What I learned from Alvin...

2008-11-20T16:12:00.000-08:00

Okay, so we were in the library yesterday, watching an old episode of Alvin and the Chipmunks, and Dave was trying to impart some parental wisdom to the kids. Alvin, being a smart aleck of course, turns to him and says,

“Dave…if I wanted a life lesson on growth, I would wear high-heels.”

This line, while being completely lost on the children, made me laugh so hard that almost my entire class, turned to look at me, making me suddenl y remember where I was (in a school library watching a kiddie movie with my 1st graders..lol). While in the moment, it was hilarious, it actually got me thinking in serious terms (I know, scary concept, but please bear with me).

You see, part of the big theme of the movie was that the boys were afraid to do something…to take a risk. Their fear kept them running around and motivated them to take extreme measures even, just to avoid that which they were afraid of. Dave, being the parent, wanted the boys to realize that they were learning just as much from the PROCESS they were going through as they would from the PRODUCT it resulted in and that they had to face their fears in order to be successful.

Naturally, this got me thinking about our walk with God. As we walk with God, he will, at times, require us to have greater faith and take bigger risks than he will at others. How many of us (myself included), have ever turned back to him, and said, “um God…I didn’t want to learn that THIS way.” Essentially, instead of realizing that God is trying to help us grow by that situation, we want to, like Alvin, whine and insist that WE know what’s best. Instead of walking through our fears, we want to avoid them at all costs.

I’ve heard so many times, that we do our greatest growth in the valleys of life. You know the times…the ones when we are fully dependent on God and when we are forced to face our fears. It’s those times when we realize the truth behind 2 Corinthians 12:9 which says,

“My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness”.

Try to remember, God always knows what he is doing. Even when it hurts, walk through it, because in the end, you will be someplace beautiful that you couldn’t have gotten to without the valley and without God’s strength being manifested through your areas of weakness. The next time you are tempted to turn to God and say, “If I wanted a life lesson on growth, I would have worn high-heels”, turn to him instead and embrace what you are going through.

Cry, scream, rant, rave, do what you have to, and then READ, PRAY, PRAISE, WORSHIP. Remind God that you know who is in charge and then acknowledge your reliance on his strength, so that he can do what he is going to do. Don’t close the avenue of growth, no matter how painful. Let God work in it…give it up to him. One of my absolute favorite songs in the world is the Ginny Owens song “If you want me to” which says:

The pathway is broken
And The signs are unclear
And I don't know the reason why You brought me here
But just because You love me the way that You do
I'm gonna walk through the valley
If You want me to

Chorus:
Cause I'm not who I was
When I took my first step
And I'm clinging to the promise You're not through with me yet
so if all of these trials bring me closer to you
Then I will walk through the fire
If You want me to

It may not be the way I would have chosen
When you lead me through a world that's not my home
But You never said it would be easy
You only said I'd never go alone

ya oh oh no

So When the whole world turns against me
And I'm all by myself
And I can't hear You answer my cries for help
I'll remember the suffering that Your love put You through
And I walk through the darkness If You want me to

cause When I cross over Jordan, I'm gonna sing, gonna shout
Gonna look into your eyes and see you never let me down
So take me on the pathway that leads me home to you
And I will walk through the valley if you want me to

Yes, I will walk through the valley if you want me to

Haha…did you ever think you would get a lesson on trust and dependence on God from an episode of Alvin and the Chipmunks? Well, neither did I…just goes to prove my point that we have to keep our eyes open to how God chooses to reveal his wisdom to us and remain open to whatever he sends our way. I hope this blesses you, and if you are in a personal valley of your own….have faith. God is the same yesterday, today, and tomorrow, and he will light your path out of it in his time.Until then, embrace the growth and know that there is a reason for everything. I leave you with these verses from the Bible:

Ecclesiates 3:1-4
1 There is a time for everything,
and a season for every activity under heaven:
2 a time to be born and a time to die,
a time to plant and a time to uproot,
3 a time to kill and a time to heal,
a time to tear down and a time to build,
4 a time to weep and a time to laugh,
a time to mourn and a time to dance,

Colossians Day #2 (& day #3 Oops!)

2008-11-20T15:41:00.000-08:00

Reading: Chapter 1: Verses 15-23

This set of verses paints a beautiful picture of Jesus Christ for the Colossians. It’s important to note here, that at this time in History, the truth of who Christ was and why he came, was beginning to be distorted. Rumors were flying all throughout the city that Christ was merely a prophet and that he was not, in fact, God in the flesh. Many people were also turning to Gnosticism (for more info, go to http://www.religioustolerance.org/gnostic2.htm), and turning away from the idea of Christianity as preached by Paul and the other apostles. Still others were following religious beliefs that were a mix of Jewish, Christian, and other Mediterranean beliefs.

One of Paul’s aims in writing this letter, was to re-establish that Christ was in fact a Supreme being (verse 15 says, “Christ is the visible image of the invisible God. He existed before anything was created and is supreme over all creation). He also wanted the people to know that Christ was the way to get to God. I think the set of verses that impacted me most from this selection, were verses 19 & 20 which say,

For God in all his fullness was pleased to live in Christ,
20 and through him God reconciled everything to himself.
He made peace with everything in heaven and on earth
by means of Christ’s blood on the cross.

I love the way Paul approaches this, because he is very straight and to the point. He tells them essentially, “Look. God WAS in Christ, Christ IS the supreme being, and the ONLY way to be reconciled with God is through the blood Christ shed on the cross.” Paul knows that all the faith he has been hearing that these Colossians have, will amount to nothing and quit producing good spiritual fruit, if they allow it to be perverted by the false teachings that are beginning to abound. Sooo…he cuts to the heart of the matter, and lays it out like it is…no fancy writing…no sugar coating or cajoling…just pure simple truth. Paul simply remind them that it is only through Christ’s redemptive work on the cross that we are able to stand “holy and blameless” (vs. 22) in God’s sight.

Having said this, Paul goes on to further remind them that they must stay true to what they know no matter what “new” theories arise. In verse 23, he tells them,
“But you must continue to believe this truth and stand firmly in it. Don’t drift away from the assurance you received when you heard the Good News.”
Once again, he is reminding them that they already KNOW who Christ is, and who they are as a result of what Christ did.

As I read these verses, I found myself thinking, “Do I always remember WHO Christ is?” As I walk day to day, do I always keep in my mind just how much of a sacrifice Christ made, when he gave his life in exchange for mine? Do I always fear and reverence Christ as the “visible image of the invisible God” ? Or do I instead, like the Colossians, let my mind be perverted by the ideas and notions of the evil one?

My initial answer wanted to be “No, I know who Christ is and what he did for me”, but if I’m honest with myself, there are times when I have limited Christ through my own doubts and failures, thus making me not much different from the Colossians who allowed other peoples distorted view affect their reality and their view of Christ. It’s time that I, like the Colossians, got back to the heart of the matter, and remembered just who my Lord and Savior really is. I need to follow the Paul’s example, and depend on, “Christ’s mighty power that works within me”.

The time to get back to basics is now. Especially since our society can so relate to these people of Colosse. We’re not much different, and, as Paul reminds us all, we have a mission. Our mission is to, “tell others about Christ, warning everyone and teaching everyone with all the wisdom God has given us. We want to present them to God, perfect in their relationship to Christ.” (vs 28). Will you join me on this mission? I sure hope so. Until next time…blessings!

XOXO
Jenn

walking strong

2008-11-19T15:30:00.001-08:00

Started about a month ago...finished today

I know you listen when I speak
And I know you hear me when I pray
Then why am I so torn in this
Why do I feel so far away?

When all my fears and my doubts
Open old wounds up anew
When I lose my solid grasp
Help me cling tighter Lord, to you

When my world begins to change
And I feel the shifting sands
It will not bury me
I'll reach for your willing hand

I know you hear me when I call
I know you're always here with me
So I will choose to still have faith
Even when my eyes can't see

Help me hold on to your words
Spoken oh so long ago
And not live by pure emotion
But clinging tightly to what I know

Because pure devotion and pure love
Is more than just what I feel
And it's faith that keeps me strong
And lets me know that you are real

So when I'm stumbling in the dark
And I cannot see or hear
Your light will lead me on
And help to calm all of my fears

As I gently take your hand
You lead me through the night
And as day dawns once again
I embrace the morning light

For night can't last forever
And the sun will shine once more
So I'll keep on walking strong
No matter what night has in store.

God's Messengers

2008-11-19T13:44:00.000-08:00

Ok Folks…story time!
Today, I was reminded (very sweetly) of how God’s messengers come in all shapes and sizes.

Due to some things going on, I had a very emotional morning this morning. I got to school early (around 6:30), and the feeling wouldn’t leave me. I sat in my classroom crying, and even emailed my friend Kelli and asked her to pray for me, because I wasn’t sure how I would be able to face these twenty little first graders that needed me to be there for them (and one especially who needs so much and who my heart breaks for every time she walks through my door).

When the bell rang at 8:00, I pasted a plastic smile on my face, and went out to greet my students. That’s when the first thing happened. One of my students (who can be a bit unruly most days), rushed up to me, little face gleaming, and wrapped his arms around me (lets just say the tears almost started all over again, only this time for a COMPLETELY different reason). “Good Morning teacher!” He shouted as he embraced me…the smile became a little less plastic.

At 8:20, we went into the library to check in our books, and watch a Thanksgiving video (Alvin and the Chipmunks…too funny). My friend Melody’s niece, Skylar, is in the kindergarten classroom that came in to watch the movie with us. About halfway through the movie, she peeked over at me, and gave me the most adorable grin in the world…the smile became a little less artificial

Finally, at recess, one of my students who was in detention, was getting ready to go out for the remainder of her recess, when she suddenly rushed back into the room. Wrapping her arms around me, she held out her tiny little hand, atop of which was a tootsie roll. “Here Miss Crone” she said, “I wanted to remember to give you this piece of candy.”…the smile became all too real.

So…what did I learn today? When you ask God for help (which I did last night and then again this morning), you never know just who or what he will send your way. He can work through anyone and anything in order to accomplish what he wants to get done. Today I am very grateful for my little messengers. What started out as a bleary day, turned out to be not so bad after all. Thank you Lord for answering my prayer.

Colossians 1:1-14

2008-11-18T12:24:00.000-08:00

I want to begin with a quick note on the book of Colossians from my Bible.

Written: Around AD 61 during Paul’s imprisonment in Rome

Author: Paul

Content: According to my Bible, Paul wrote to the Colossians to answer the question of Who is Jesus? HE was attempting, by his letter, to combat many pagan ideas that had sprung up at the time and that were becoming a part of the Colossian community. Paul was concerned that the teachers in Colosse where teaching ideas that were a combination of Christian ideals and these new Pagan beliefs, so he wanted to correct some of their misguided views, and replace them with the truth of who Christ is and why he came. He wanted to highlight the uniqueness of Christ to the Christian walk and return the Colossian people to their strong roots (The Colossians were known as a people full of great faith and belief in Jesus Christ).

Chapter 1 Verses 1-14

Paul begins by acknowledging the faith of the Colossian people and reminding them of all he has heard about them. He commends them for being confident that they will enter the Kingdom of Heaven, and for accepting and loving God’s people.

How I wish, that we could all learn from the strong Christians at Colosse. Despite the pagan theories and witchcraft and false ideas and false Gods (sound like a familiar place?) that were creeping into their society, this Christian faction of Colosse, was so strong that Paul all the way in Rome, had heard of their faithfulness and was impressed by it.

After praising the Colossians for what he has heard about them thus far, Paul goes on to pass on his hopes for them. The parts that stuck with me from this section, are verses 9-10.

“…We ask God to give you complete knowledge of his will and to give you spiritual wisdom and understanding. 10 Then the way you live will always honor and please the Lord, and your lives will produce every kind of good fruit. All the while, you will grow as you learn to know God better and better.”

I think the reason this part struck me personally, is I have been doing some serious business with God the last six months regarding his will and following his will and knowing what his will is in every circumstance. Paul’s prayer to the Colossians is my prayer for us all. I pray that God will, in his mercy, give us complete knowledge of his will and spiritual wisdom and understanding. The book of James tells us,

“If you need wisdom, ask our generous God, and he will give it to you” (1:5)

This is something we all need to do, because as Paul says in verse 10,

“Then the way you live will please the Lord and you will produce every kind of good fruit”

(Paul’s reference to the fruit of the spirit: Love, Joy, Peace, Patience, Kindness, Goodness, Faithfulness, Gentleness, and self-control).

What I took from all of this, was that the way to have this “fruit” manifested in your life, was by becoming wise in the things of God. By growing and learning about God more and more and who he is (and more specifically, according to Paul, who Jesus Christ is and how he fits into God’s plan for us).

As Kelli and I continue to venture into Colossians, I pray that we too may, like the people of Colosse, grow in spiritual knowledge and understanding of God. I already feel like I know more, and we’ve only ventured into the first 14 verses! I can’t wait to see what the remainder brings!

Blessings~
Jenn

Bible Reading

2008-11-18T12:22:00.000-08:00

OKAY, SO I STOLE THIS FROM HER AND DIDN'T WRITE IT LOL

My best friend over at AND WE DANCED… and I decided to do an online Blog Bible Study through the book of Colossians. If any of you would like to join, we would love to have you!!! Just leave a comment that you posted on your site, or leave your thoughts in my comment box. Since Kelli and I don’t live close by, we decided to try the email bible study a few years ago and LOVED it. Now that we both blog, we thought we would do it over here instead, that way anyone can participate and feel blessed as well.We just want to make this simple. Make a way to hold us accountable to studying God’s word together, which we LOVE to do! Postings will be on Tuesdays and Thursday. All you have to do is share your thoughts on the assigned passage. Kelli and I feel so blessed whenever we do this for we always learn so much from each other. We’d love to have you join us! Many Blessings!!
Tues, Nov 18: Col 1: 1-14
Thurs, Nov 20: Col 1:15-23
Tues, Nov 25: Col 1: 24-29
Tues, Dec 2: Col 2: 1-23
Thurs, Dec 4: Col 3: 1-17
Tues, Dec 9: Col 3: 18- Col 4:1
Thurs, Dec 11: Col 4:2-17

Grateful Monday...

2008-11-17T12:07:00.000-08:00

13) For the ability to have a vehicle and drive anywhere I want (I got a ticket last night b/c my tags are overdue, so I am reminding myself, humbly, that I am blessed to at least have a vehicle and shouldn’t take it for granted).

14) For my talk with Alyssa last week. By the time it was done, we were both crying, and she has been much better this week

15) For my sissy who is there when I need her most, knows how to cheer me up, and who always has my back

16) For Homemade soup on a Sunday afternoon (Kelli, we must’ve been of like mind, but my soup was Turkey and whatever else I found in the kitchen..lol…garbanzo beans, cabbage, squash, white beans, and celery..yummy!!)

17) For prayer partners. I never knew it was sooo comforting to have other people pray for you.

18) For God being more vocal with me. He has been opening my eyes to many things and he has been not so subtle about it lately.

19) For my kids having the week off next week, b/c I seriously need a break! LOL

20) For the chance to watch the sunrise on my way to work in the morning

21) For my ipod and my new music phone (my old phone broke). I am such a lover of music…call it an obsession if you will, and the ability to take it wherever I want and listen to it is incredible!!

22) For having a phone credit and Verizon deal large enough that my new phone was FREE!

23) For the ability to read my Bible whenever and wherever I want. I think we often take that for granted.

24) That my mom has been sober the last THREE times I have talked to her. Baby steps…

When God Speaks....Trust

2008-11-17T07:00:00.000-08:00

Okay, so when God wants me to learn something, I think he has decided that he really needs to hit me over the head LOL (shows how well he knows me..lol). Anyway, this will make more sense, if you read my BLOG titled "Have Faith" from a few days ago first. This was from my email daily devotional NOT WRITTEN BY ME!

Today's Scripture"Trust in the Lord with all your heart; do not depend on your own understanding. Seek his will in all you do, and he will show you which path to take." Proverbs 3:5-6 NLT

Thoughts for TodayIn today's world, a sense of safety and security may be difficult to find.
The good news is that there is one way we can always be secure.
Most people feel more secure when they are in control.
Somehow a trip down a mountain road does not feel as dangerous to us when we have our hands on the steering wheel.
The passengers with us are likely to have much greater anxiety.
Having control over our circumstances is very important to most of us--
it makes us feel more secure and confident.
But we can't always be in control.
And when circumstances beyond our control happen,
we may feel helpless and experience panic or depression.
God provides a way for us to always experience a sense of security.
He leaves it up to us ... we can either continue depending on ourselves, panicking or losing hope when we can't control a situation ... or we can depend on the Lord.
If we choose Jesus and his way for our lives, we can always be secure in his love.
We will still experience problems and trials on this earth, but we will begin to view them from an eternal perspective.
When we turn control over to Jesus, we can know that no matter what challenges or trials we face, he will ultimately work them out for good.
Consider this... Whose hands have control of your steering wheel?
Are you still trying to control every detail of your life?
Do you experience frustration, fear or even anger when you can't control what is happening to you?
Consider turning everything over to Jesus.
You can trust him.

Morning Hush

2008-11-14T07:30:00.000-08:00

Lately, I’ve been discovering the simple beauty that is unique to the morning hours. A self-proclaimed “Night owl”, I was always the last one in bed at a slumber party, and the last one up the next day! I’ve often laughed at the idea that I became a teacher, thinking maybe I should have become a radio DJ or something…something to coincide with my desire to be up all night, and my often inability even, to get my body to fall into a sleep rhythm before midnight.

Recently, however, I’ve been in a different mode. It all started when I decided to get up a little earlier and spend time with God in the morning. The first few mornings, I struggled. “God?” I’d say questioningly, “I’m really sorry I fell asleep on you this morning…I’ll do better next time.” I’m not sure if I actually BELIEVED I would do better next time, but I figured if I told the big man upstairs that I would, I would at least feel obligated to…hahaha…ever felt like that?

However…as I began day after day to remain faithful to my promise to get up early and be in the word and in his presence, I found that he began to work IN me, and I began to look forward to my mornings rather than dread the half hour of lost sleep. There is something just “different” about the air in the morning…it’s enchanting. There’s this hush over the world that doesn’t exist at night. Even my noisy downstairs neighbors are snug in their bed, and I find I can concentrate on God, rather than resisting the urge to yell, “Would you shut up?” down the stairwell towards their apartment. As I sit on the couch, legs tucked neatly underneath, hot tea in one hand and my Bible in the other, I find I am more content than I am when I try to hurry through my nightly “God” time so I can go to bed b/c I have filled up my day with so many things that I’ve left him, accidently, till last. Starting my day with God is a simple reminder, instead, of the place he is to hold in my life. He is to be the 1st..not the last, and in the morning hush, I feel that so uniquely.

This morning, I think, was the best ever (and the inspiration for this post). I got up as usual, spent my time with God, and then proceeded to get ready for work. As I was getting ready, my mind raced through about a million different things (must have been the extra tea bag I put in my tea this morning…too much caffeine!). By the time I got into the car, I was frustrated, and thinking about many things that I had sworn to give up to God. So…on top of being frustrated…I was mad at myself for the direction of my thoughts. I’m driving to work, and the world is still slightly dark, and covered in a thick layer of fog. The frustration is rising as I angrily hit “eject” on my new Taylor swift CD and toss it haphazardly into the seat next to me (hahaha…what did Taylor Swift ever do to me? Poor thing). Driving down the road, I raise my eyes to the heavens, and what did I do? I screamed! I’m not even kidding you…I screamed until my voice hurt and I was laughing rather than frustrated. In the middle of my laughter, I looked up, and saw the most beautiful sunrise coming through the fog on my right, and the moon still full in the sky on my left. It took my breath away, and reminded me of the power of the one I was screaming to. Peace filled me instantly, and I knew that God was there for me no matter what.

So…what did I learn from all of this? Well first…try to avoid screaming in the car…I’m pretty sure my throat is going to hurt all day..lol. Second, and most important…maybe I didn’t know what I was doing when I decided to get up early and spend time with God each morning, but I see…more and more each day, that God knew exactly what he was doing my planting that idea in my mind. His ways are inexplicable sometimes, but they are always for our good, and they are always right. I hope your day is blessed.

XOXO~
Jenn

For all the singles out there!

2008-11-13T11:58:00.001-08:00

NOT WRITTEN BY ME

I read this devotional this morning, and it made so much sense to me! I think single men too can get alot out of this. Anyway, it was interesting so I thought I'd share.

XOXO
Jenn

November 13, 2008

Even a Great Husband Makes a Very Poor God
Lysa TerKeurst

"Speak to the Israelites and say to them: 'I am the LORD your God..."
Leviticus 18:2 (NIV)

Devotion:
I've often wished I could travel back 16 years ago and give my "young bride self" some advice. But since that's not possible, I love sharing what I've learned with others.

Recently, I had dinner with a 28 year-old friend who would love to one day be married. During our time together the conversation flowed freely about all sorts of things. Blogs. Writing. Leaving your comfort zone because God said so. Biscuits. You know, girl stuff. And then we moved on to the subject of relationships and marriage.

I shared with my friend that when I was single I thought marriage was all about finding the right partner. I thought if you find "the one," you'll be happy, secure, and fulfilled. I do think it's good to have a list of standards that you look for in a spouse. However, it can never be with the expectation that if you find that special someone, he'll right all your wrongs and fill up all your insecurities. The problem with this thinking is the pressure it will eventually put on your spouse.

To expect another person to make you feel happy, secure, and fulfilled will leave you disappointed at best and disillusioned at worst. Even a great husband makes a very poor God. Only God can settle those deep heart-needs. A man can never do this. If a husband could meet every need his wife had, we'd have no need for God.

Therefore, instead of just focusing on finding the right partner, let God work on your heart to help you become the right partner. The time to start working on becoming a wife is now. Before the white dress, delicate bouquets, unity candle, bacon wrapped shrimp, and reception punch, there is some heart stuff to consider:

Getting married doesn't instantly make you selfless... it makes you realize how very selfish you can be at times.

Getting married doesn't make you feel loved... it makes you realize love is more of a decision you make than a feeling you feel.

Getting married doesn't take away loneliness... it makes you realize true companionship comes not when you demand it but rather when you give it to another person. So, what does marriage give?

A beautiful chance to make the choice to ...
Laugh whether or not the jokes are funny.
Love by folding his collar over his tie every morning.
Pretend like you don't need flowers, but delight when he buys them anyway.
Cheer him on through both failures and successes.
Tell him he's a great man everyday.
Thank God for the privilege of being his wife.

After our time together, my friend thanked me for our talk. She said it gave her a lot to think about. To be honest, it gave me a lot to think about as well.

Have faith....

2008-11-12T22:17:00.000-08:00

Have Faith in God” Jesus answered
Mark 11:22

We live by Faith not by sight
2 Corinthians 5:7

Lately, I have begun to slowly recognize the whisper of my God. I tried for so long to hear it…beating my head on the wall and wanting to tear my hair out, but it’s funny, I was waiting for a loud booming voice to declare to me what I should do or how I should proceed, but lately, God’s words have come to me as the smallest whisper, and let me tell you, it is the sweetest sound I have ever heard. Today, in the midst of about five million things, the little voice in my soul whispered “Have Faith my child…have faith that I always work for the good of my people.” Instantly, like a warm wave, I felt peace wash over me. Yeah…God IS that good :o)

There are crazy things going on with my mom lately, it would take me days to tell you about it all, but today, I got a small glimpse behind the curtain of how God is working in her situation, even when it seems nothing has changed. It made me realize that there are things going in the supernatural that we are not even aware of. It made me realize that even when we think nothing is changing or nothing is happening, things ARE happening, and God knows what he is doing. “Have Faith” he whispers to me, and I drink in his words like the sweetest water I’ve ever tasted. My sight tells me that things won’t change, but my faith knows different and I can see that so clearly today. I feel like God has parted a curtain for just a second to allow me a quick glimpse of his majesty.

“Here…” he says, “Can you see it here? I’m in it…I know all about it…I’m on top of it…Have faith my child.”

There are so many other things happening in life right now, and they all remind me that there are times life just spins out of your control. This has always been a hard concept for me, because I tend to freak out when it seems life is out of control. Nothing bothers me more than things I have no control over (sound familiar?). I once even told a friend of mine, that the reason I stopped partying and drinking when I was younger, was not because I didn’t like alcohol, but because I didn’t like losing even the slightest control over myself. (okay, it helps that the Bible admonishes drunkenness, but if I’m being truly honest, at that time of my life, I didn’t consult God about whether or not I should stop drinking, it was simply a control issue). It’s the same reason I was bulimic for two years in high-school. I wanted to be in control.

Anyway, long story short, I have always struggled to hand the steering wheel over to God and say, “okay, you drive”, and as a result, he continually pushes me into these situations where I have no choice.

Take last summer for example. I lost my job, and there were moments when I wasn’t sure I was going to be able to buy groceries for the next week, let alone make the rent payment. I smiled my smile and let on that things were better than they actually were, but at the same time, I chose to trust God that he would provide for me and that the “I’m alright” I said to everyone would prove true if only I would let him lead. “God will provide” I told them, and though I had my small moments of doubt and tears, I truly believed that. AND, not only did God provide, but he brought people into my life who saw through my façade and who were there for me although I fought and fought and fought asking for help. They just knew what I needed, even when it was simply a hug or a “You’ll be alright”.

So…why do I have such a hard time letting go and letting God when he has proven so many times that he comes through? I don’t know…I only know that each time I choose to exercise my faith, my ability to have Faith in God and see beyond my situation increases. My hope is that one day my faith will be complete in him and he will be pleased with this daughter of the King.
So yeah…this post kinda got away from me and wound up as more than I ever intended (I love when God does things like that), but my original point was that today, my God whispered to me,
“have faith my child…have faith that I always work for the good of my people,”
and I want to shout back to him,
“Okay God. This scared little girl is stepping off the cliff, because I know full well your hands will be there to catch me.”

That doesn’t mean that I won’t have my moments of doubt and insecurity. No…I know there will be more tears shed along this journey…I know I am only human and prone to human emotion, but I also know that I have the best tour guide known to man, and he can lead me through anything. He is the light of the world, and the world is a pretty big place, so I know he is more than capable of lighting my path. So I am committing to doing a few things, and I want to share them with you so you can keep me accountable to my journey of faith.

#1: I am choosing to stay in the WORD

Psalm 119:105 Thy word is a lamp unto my feet, and a light unto my path.

#2: I am choosing to abide in God through prayer.

Colossians 4:2 Devote yourselves to prayer, being watchful and thankful.

1 Thessalonians 5:17-18 Be joyful always; pray continually; give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus.

#3 I am choosing to look beyond the storms and have faith that no matter what life brings, God is always working for my good.

Romans 8:28(btw 8/28 is my b-day lol) And we know that God causes everything to work together for the good of those who love God and who have been called according to his purpose.

Jeremiah 29:11 - "For I know the plans I have for you,"declares the Lord, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future."

Well, it’s getting late, and I might add more to this later, but I pray you are all blessed and you all have moments, like today, when you feel God’s presence so strongly it’s as if he is wrapping you in his arms.

XOXO
Jenn

PS-A Big thanks also goes out to Kelli….you know why…part of what you told me this morning led to this revelation. Thanks for being you, and thanks for being there :o)

Again....

2008-11-12T13:48:00.000-08:00

No One Else Knows
By: Building 429

My world is closing in
On the inside
But I’m not showing it
When all I am is crying out
I hold it in and fake a smile
Still I’m broken
I’m broken

Only one can understand
And only one can hold the hand
Of the broken
Of the broken
When no one else knows how I feel
Your love for me is proven real
When no one else cares where I’ve been
You run to me with outstretched hands
And You hold me in your arms
Again

I need no explanation of why me
I just need confirmation
Only You could understand the emptiness inside my head
I am falling
I am falling
I’m falling down upon my knees
To find the one who gives me peace
I am flying
Lord I am flying

When no one else knows how I feel
Your love for me is proven real
When no one else cares where I’ve been
You run to me with outstretched hands
And You hold me in Your arms
Again

I have come to you in search of faith
Cause I can’t see beyond this place
Oh You are God and I am man
So I’ll leave it in Your hands

Gratefulness

2008-11-10T07:29:00.000-08:00

So my San Diego B/F/F Kelli has been writing down things she is grateful for each week. Today I thought I'd copy her..b/c I LOVE that idea :o)

What I am grateful for this week:

1) For spontaneous moments....like PJ day at work! (I am sooo comfortable right now!!)

2) For friends and family who push me and make me think

3) For my students, who remind me to see things from a different perspective every once in awhile

4) For Aaron who sends me his Bible verses daily, who inspires me to be in the Word as much as possible and who reminds me to let God have control.

5) For my Pastor's awesome message yesterday on prayer and how simple God makes it to just come to him whenever, wherever, with whatever we need.

6) For Ryan who fixed my squeaky brake yesterday and taught me a bit about brakes in the process (finally I can drive with my windows down again and not go deaf from turning up my music to drown it out!) and did it WAY CHEAPER than an auto mechanic store would have.

7)For Kelli, who I miss constantly, but who manages to...even across the miles, always encourage, inspire, and uplift me.

8) For my breakout and Sunday School kids who challenge me to be a better shepard of the next generation, and who instill in me the desire to teach them that they need to set the example for the generation after them.

9) For green tea on a cold Fall day.

10) For my grade level colleaugues without whom I would be drowning in a new grade level! They often hold me up spiritually, emotionally, and educationally (lol) and they are some of the most giving people I have ever met!

11) For friends who love to play games as much as I do! (although I am officially admitting I suck at Balderdash...bring on the Taboo!!)

12) For Nilda, who not only knows my heart and lets me say whatever I want while she listens, but who also lets me do my laundry at her house and is my gym motivator (78 pounds this morning!!).

2008-11-08T13:28:00.000-08:00

Guess I'm in the mood to write today. Here is a new one for you...

The winds are shifting….my world is rearranging…
Changing…..slowly day by day
The laughter is fading
Replaced with awkward moments of silence
The warm sun, which seemed as if it would shine forever
Is giving way to gray skies and streams of rain
The winds are shifting…my world is rearranging…
Changing….slowly day by day
The ties are breaking….the rope is fraying…
The anchor is lifting….the tide is turning
The winds are shifting…my world is rearranging
Changing…slowly day by day
Two hands open….setting the caged-bird free
Only time will tell….if it will return to me
The winds are shifting…our world is rearranging
Changing….slowly day by day
Time is fading….night is here
Will the morning sun ever reappear?
The winds are shifting….your vessel is moving
Sailing swiftly out to sea
The winds are shifting...I'm still ashore
Hoping you'll sail back for me
Where will these winds take you?
Will you one day return to me?
These questions remain unanswered
Only time will fill them in
So I'll walk these shores alone
And watch the direction of the wind...

Stuck in my head

2008-11-08T12:56:00.001-08:00

I've been listening to the Shawn Mcdonald CD "Simply nothing" and this song is stuck in my head...

Have you Ever

Have you ever wanted to be someone else
Have you ever wanted just to be someone
Have you ever wanted to reach your dreams
Have you ever wanted life to be more than it seems
I have tasted of a love so wide
That it stops all my time
I have tasted of a love so deep
That it blows my mind
Have you ever wanted to reach up and touch the sky
Have you ever wanted to pack it up and say good-bye
Have you ever wanted someone to care
Have you ever wanted someone to be there
He is sweet, He is sweet
What your looking for...Is my sweet, sweet Jesus
What You're looking for...Is my sweet Lord

How big is your God?

2008-11-07T07:13:00.000-08:00

This caught my eye from my daily devotional...NOT WRITTEN BY ME!!

When your God is too small, your problems are too big and you retreat in fear and insecurity. But when your God is great, your problems pale into insignificance and you stand in awe as you worship the King.

How big is your God? Big enough to intervene? Big enough to be trusted? Big enough to be held in awe and ultimate respect? Big enough to erase your worries and replace them with peace?
Remember: the more you know God, the bigger He becomes.

**I need to remember that. Thank you God for showing me that :o)

Out of the mouths of babes

2008-11-06T12:31:00.000-08:00

A quick cute story I just thought of when I was emailing my best friend Kelli.

The other day, one of my students was drawing me, and she said
"I need yellow for your hair"
I looked at her and said,
"Really? Does my hair look yellow to you?"
She paused for a moment...grinned, and then said,
"Yeah...and orange."

How cute is that??

Pause

2008-11-06T12:07:00.000-08:00

Lately...I really feel like God is telling me that I have to find time to pause during the day and just stay at his feet for a moment. Life has been so busy and I am always here there and everywhere and doing this that or the other thing, and like most of you, I feel like pulling out my hair many days. I can't remember the last time I actually ate dinner in my own apartment or got in the door before 9pm. In the middle of this whirlwind, many things have been tossed aside. I don't spend as much time with my friends as I used to, while I still read the Bible daily, I don't go as "in-depth" with the word as I did over the summer, this week...with report cards due, I didn't even have time to do laundry, and now I find myself wondering if I have anything clean to wear to work tomorrow..lol.

Through all of this, I began to hear God whisper gently..."Just pause...won't you pause for a moment my child" His whisper was louder and clearer than anyone screaming could have been. It stalled me for a moment...it made me freeze...it brought me to a halt. It made me realize that I NEED this time with him...even if it's brief...in order to face my day and get through all of the above. So....I've been getting up a little earlier (what's an extra ten minutes when I'm already tired...right?). I've also been finding that my biggest time to pause has been my drive to work. Let me tell you...God and I do some business in the car lately. The weather too, has been fantastic, and God is using it to remind me of my promise.

This morning, on the drive to work, I snapped a pic of the sunrise...God's simple reminder to me that I had set this time aside for him. I don't know why, but the rising and setting of the sun reminds me..moreso than any other act of creation, that God is in charge and that we are to seek him and his will first.

So...I invite you all to pause with me. I guarantee you, if you make time for him, he will make sure you have time for everything else. Don't be afraid to give up those extra ten or fifteen minutes, because the time you spend with God is priceless and cannot be measured by earthly standards. Maybe you, like me, want to pause during your morning drive...put on that praise song and go for it! Maybe you need to pause at the end of the day in order to drop into a restful sleep. Well? What are you waiting for. JUST DO IT! I promise you won't regret it.

Blessings~

Jenn

The Sun after the Rain

2008-11-04T11:45:00.001-08:00

I love the way the world looks just after a rainstorm. Everything smells fresh and new. There are still clouds in the sky, yet the sun is shining through strong and sure. This...to me, is one of the biggest mirrors of the way our life with Christ is. The rains come, and they can be scary at times, but if we hold on, the clouds eventually part and the sun finds its way into our lives again. I've been holding onto that lately, and meditating on it, so that I know, even in the storms of my own life, that God's hand is always there. Anyway, it's been raining lately (in more ways than one), but the sun is shining in the sky, and this morning, God used the real sky to remind me of that fact. May you all be blessed and know that he is guiding you always.

XOXO

Jenn

He does it again....

2008-10-31T11:48:00.000-07:00

This verse came to me in three different ways in the past two days:

But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me.

It's funny, b/c I have been spiritually/emotionally/mentally very weak lately. I'll guess now I just have to sit back and see how Christ will manifest his power through my weakness. Hmm....I'll keep you updated!

Pics of my classroom!

2008-10-30T17:27:00.000-07:00

This is my Writing Charts Wall with an area for each part of the writing process

This is my writing wall with pockets for student writing samples.

This is my discipline wall, as well as a place for calendar, 100 day chart, etc...

***I took these on my phone the weekend we decorated. Many thanks to Manny my paper man, and my other recruits: Nilda, Aaron, Leslie, Cathy, Jocelyn, Luke, Danika, And Shayla!

XOXO
Jenn

2008-10-30T12:18:00.000-07:00

FROM MY DAILY DEVOTIONAL
**Not written by me....

The things we watch, what we think and how we spend our time are the "secret places" Satan can and will use against us. Yet often we continue in our secrecy, afraid to reach for Truth. Why?

Secret places seem safe. Secret places are familiar. Secret places feel comfortable to us. So we cling to them.

It's not that we don't want to be honest and get real about the secret places in our soul. It's just sometimes easier to keep the truth hidden than it is to get real about things from the inside-out. Though most of us crave authenticity, our fears of being "found out" are what keep us living in secret, exactly where Satan wants us to stay. The crafty, conniving one knows that if he can get us to continue to bury our secret places deep within our heart, we can't be effective for God. He knows that thoughts of our private sins will eventually eat away at us, causing us to feel fraudulent and unworthy of the love and acceptance of others, and most of all, our Heavenly Father. But the truth is, we are the ones who don't love and accept ourselves. Not God.

Friends, the message of Jesus Christ is one of hope and restoration. It is one of freedom. It is one of unconditional love and acceptance. And it is one of Truth and spiritual exposure. What He is after from all of us is greater authenticity, greater genuineness, and the Truth, found in Him. In His sovereignty, He knows it is what we truly crave. "What you're after is truth, from the inside-out" Psalm 51:6 (MSG).
So, how do we combat those secret keeping habits we've developed over time?

1) Practice telling the truth. Telling the truth is a choice and needs to be a conviction. Healthy habits can and will be formed when practiced repeatedly, and truth telling is an important habit to get into.

2) Develop a genuinely authentic faith. Recognize the importance of authenticity, and begin making it of utmost priority. Do things to strengthen your walk (prayer, Bible study, etc.) and guard your mind.

3) Recognize that no one has it all together. See Satan's lie for what it is and determine not to get into the comparison trap with others. You cannot know what a person is all about by what they look like on the outside.

4) Stop trying to be perfect, act confident, appear happy, and seem super spiritual. These are some of the most common ways we, as women, pretend. It is only when we operate in a spirit of truth and openness that we will be able to live without pretense.

5) Determine to live your life with a genuineness that others will cling to and want to emulate. Honesty facilitates honesty. When you begin to get real and honest, hiding nothing in your relationship with God and others, people will begin to take notice and follow suit. This will strengthen all of your relationships and build up your self-esteem!

When we no longer hide in our "secret places," we can venture down a different path of greater authenticity and truth, bringing us to a place of ultimate and lasting freedom. And it is in freedom that we find no value in being a secret keeper any more.

God is in the small stuff

2008-10-28T12:21:00.000-07:00

**Okay, so the picture doesn't even do it justice, but it WAS early, and I WAS taking it from my camera phone inside my car with a dirty windshield not daring to look b/c I was driving, lol, so this is what you get! Read below, and the pic will make sense!

God is in the small stuff:

It's funny to me, how God shows himself in the most random of moments. This morning, I was running late (I fell asleep on the couch with my ipod on, AFTER my alarm went off). As I went through my morning, I focused on not letting it stress me out (something I've been working on lately). I got through my morning routine, and kept repeating to myself, "God is in charge, and I will not stress out." One of my reasons for doing this, was that my morning always bleeds into what happens in my classroom. Since my students and I have been working for the last week on creating a calm environment, I KNEW, if I let myself get upset, I would be harsh or impatient with my students because I would start my school day with that hurried/rushed feeling inside.

I was almost ready to go, and went to get dressed, when I couldn't find the top I wanted to wear. Of course, that led to a COMPLETE change of outfit, b/c it was the only top that went with the pants I was planning on wearing, which led to another ten minutes of digging since I had done laundry last night and had yet to put anything away. Through the whole thing, I worked on staying calm and worshipping God...not letting events that were beyond my control effect the mood I was in. It was a test, but when I walked out the door (almost 20 minutes late), I felt surprisingly calm.

So I'm driving to work, listening to my favorite I'm late for work song "Just one of those Days" by 33 miles, and I'm bopping my head to the music and smiling away, and I look up, to see the most BEAUTIFUL sunrise peeking up through the hills. The world was covered in a slight haze, so I got a clear view of brilliant orange and red as the sun rose through the haze. Had it not been for the haze, I wouldn't have been able to stare that clearly at the sun. As I looked at it, for a moment I couldn't breathe. Just the thought of a God who would create something so purely marvelous, was almost too much to comprehend.

In the middle of my musings, I realized something of great importance. Had I not been running late, I would have missed this moment. Had my day not started the way it had, I would not have had the experience of watching this incredible God-created Orb take it's rightful place in the morning sky. I would have been in my classroom grading papers or setting up for the day, and it would have passed unnoticed. How amazing is our God that he could see the wonder I would have in this moment and find just the right way to arrange my circumstances and cause it to come to fruition? Had I allowed myself to feel frustrated and angry with my morning situation, I probably would have been too self-involved to even notice the splendor in the morning!

So, what did I learn from this? That even life's little moments are planned out in advanced. That even a day that starts out bleak can become something to remember. That I need to trust God more and learn to see his hand in all things, for his hand IS in all things. That, as the Bible says, If I know God is leading my steps, why should I try and understand everything that happens along the way. My God knows what he is doing, and even when I can't see it, he is working for my good.

And all this, from being late...hahaha...THAT, to me, is the most amazing part of all :o)

Blessings~

Jenn

Trust

2008-10-28T09:51:00.001-07:00

I have something I want to write about later, when I have time, but for now...I leave you with this...it was the verse in my daily devotional, and speaks so much truth:

"Trust God from the bottom of your heart; don't try to figure out everything on your own. Listen for God's voice in everything you do, everywhere you go; he's the one who will keep you on track." Proverbs 3:5-6 MSG

XOXO
Jenn

What a difference a day makes

2008-10-27T11:50:00.000-07:00

Written just now....

The sun is shining....I feel it's warmth on my skin
The breeze blows slightly...it ruffles my hair
Childrens' laughter dances on the wind
Caressing my ears with its musical sound

My Lord sits high above all
The same today, yesterday, and forever
How quickly we forget
When encased in our own selfishness

Everything stills for a moment
And I hold my breath expectantly
A gentle hand...unseen
Holds me caringly in its palm

Invisible, the fingers reach out
Wipe the tears away
Restore, Renew, Revive
Calm follows the storm

Visible, a hand reaches out
Words exchanged, help offered
The one sent by the storm calmer
Brings about a smile

Eyes close, peaceful slumber
Awaken to a brand new day

The sun is shining...I feel its warmth on my skin
The breeze blows slightly...it ruffles my hair
Childrens' laughter...dances on the wind
Caressing my ears with its musical sound

My lord sits high above all
The same yesterday, today, and forever
For a moment memory receded
But now...hope is restored, refreshed...renewed

Now...vision is clear, rivers are dry
Eyes focus on the one true love
Who sits high above all
The same today, yesterday, and forever
Memory returns......life goes on.

Letting Go

2008-10-26T13:17:00.000-07:00

Written early this morning...

Hands grip tightly
To the fleeting hope of love
But love contained
Tears and breaks the soul

Shattered pieces lay on the ground
Waiting to be gathered
What will become of them?
Can they be made whole?

Rivers flow unbidden
Unwelcomed...unwanted
They could fill an ocean...
When will they dry?

Alone..one sits questioning
Life...love...the will of God
All seem foreign on this shore
The answers escape unheard

Hands open...grip loosens
Pandora's box-top is gone
The river deepens
The current rushes faster

A figure stands alone
Waving forlornly from the shore
Hands empty at last
She turns and walks away...

TGIF

2008-10-24T09:43:00.000-07:00

My kids have been really good the last few days, but for some reason...I am really feeling it! I need to get away for a day or two and recharge, but don't know when that will happen. We'll see...maybe God will bring that about in some cool random way (hey...it could happen..lol) Anyway, I have a charity BONKO tournament with some friends tomorrow...should be fun. I also teach this Sunday. Whoo hoo for 5th graders. Hard to keep them entertained, but sooo worth it! Have a fabulous weekend everyone!

XOXO

Jenn

2008-10-23T12:23:00.000-07:00

From my daily devotionals...NOT WRITTEN BY ME

"But Jesus looked at them and said to them, 'With men this is impossible, but with God all things are possible.' " (Matthew 19:26)

I heard the story of an elderly minister who liked to visit people in hospitals. He often would take along a little, embroidered bookmark that he carried in his Bible. On the back of the bookmark were a group of tangled threads with no apparent pattern. He would hand this bookmark, with the back facing up, to those who were hurting or upset and say, "Look at that and tell me what it says."

As they looked at all the tangled threads, they would say, "I have no idea what it says. It doesn't seem to say anything."

Then he said, "Now, turn it over." As they would flip that bookmark over, they saw the words, "God is love." The minister would say,

"Many times as we look at what God is doing, we just see tangled threads with no rhyme or reason. But from God's perspective, He is dealing with us in love, and He knows what He is doing."

The next time you think it is all over for you, just remember how things turned out for Joseph. Just remember how things turned out for Daniel. No doubt things looked pretty dim when he was in the den of lions. It looked hopeless as well for Shadrach, Meshach, and Abed-Nego when they were thrown into the fiery furnace. Things looked pretty grim for Peter when he was in prison. And things looked bleak for Martha and Mary when their brother died.

You see, things can look bad at one moment, but then God will step in and turn events around. Then suddenly you'll look back and say,

"Now I understand what God was doing."

I've been tagged!

2008-10-23T07:00:00.000-07:00

Okay so I’ve been “tagged” by Kelli who told me I have to write things about myself that no-one knows. Ouch…that’s a hard one. I’m often an open book, so there’s not much that NO ONE knows about me. Let’s see….Can I change it to things no one or ONLY A FEW people know about me? Wait! It’s my blog, so I guess so :o) Okay…here goes…

#1: When I’m really down, I play some type of music I used to love (you know…the stuff you liked during that PHASE in your life). Currently I’d say Nsync and Bryan White top the list.

#2: I really suck at geography. I can’t tell you where a country is to save my life (I’m lucky if I get it on the right continent).

#3: I currently have a strange obsession with raw mushrooms that I can’t explain

#4: At the absolute heaviest point in my life, I weighed over 300 pounds (ouch..I know!)

#5: I dislike the idea of dating. I think it puts too much strain on people to not be themselves and puts unnecessary expectations on the people involved. Just look at a “first date” for example. You spend the whole time “selling” yourself, in hopes that the other person will like you, and you spend the rest of the night wondering how far is “too-far” for a first date and/or who should pay, so by the end of the night you are no closer to knowing the real person you are with, and you are stressed out as you try to figure out if you should hug at the door, let them kiss you, or in the case of some people…even more. Ew! I think if everyone got to know each other first and then decided to either be in a relationship or not be in a relationship, a lot of relationships (as in friends) could be saved and there wouldn’t be as many “messy” break-ups. Anyway…off my soapbox now. Most people have told me my opinion on this subject is cracked, so it’s okay if you do too.

#6- In my biggest moments of weakness, I wonder why my friends are my friends.

#7-A few times a year, I think about getting in the car and just taking off and starting over. This is not a strike against my friends and family, b/c they are awesome, but I have a restless soul…hahaha, something else most people don’t know about me.

#8-My two favorite smells are an ice rink and wet cement

#9-I was named after a character on Days of Our Lives. Her name on the show was Jennifer Rose, and it stuck.

#10-I wonder sometimes if I’m going to be single for the rest of my life.

#11-I think this list is kind of depressing…I need to find more exciting things people don’t know about me :o)

#12-I have written 5 full-length plays

#13-I have an obsession with teenage/young adult/children’s fiction. I’d rather read that over anything else any given day.

#14-I recently decided if I’m not married by the time I’m 33, I want to become a foster mom or look into adoption.

#15-I have an OBSESSION with music. I listen to music almost 24-7 except when working, and I think the ipod is the greatest invention known to man (props to Aaron for my ipod shuffle)

#16-I usually only like hot-dogs if eaten at the beach and really really burnt.

#17-I hate Bologna

#18-My favorite TV shows ever were Joan of Arcadia, Roswell, and Buffy the Vampire Slayer

#19-One of my favorite things to do ever is sit by a fire with some sort of warm beverage (tea, coffee, cider, hot chocolate…makes no difference). There is something very soothing about fire. Include music and you’ve described my dream evening. I love outdoor pits and fireplaces equally.

#20-During Christmas (on my brain b/c Holiday season is coming), I’ve been known to sit in the dark for hours with no lights on except the lights from the tree. The peaceful feeling ranks right up there with fires. Again, add warm beverage and music and you have the perfect evening.

#21-I’m supposed to be working right now, so I’ve got to STOP this (and 21 is my favorite number, so there!)

***I don't have anyone to "tag" b/c Kelli is the only one I know with a blog..lol